Saturday, January 31, 2009

25 thigns meme

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged.

1. I am a huge Harry Potter fan. The books accompanied me through my school days: I read the first one beginning of my secondary school years and the final one in my final year at uni. Its the great amount of imagination, and work/research Rowling's put into it that made it so magical and engaging. I'm almost terribly realistic but Harry Potter made me imagine, so its quite a feat really.

2. I love Grey's Anatomy - drama, medicine, good looking people, witty dialogues, sex. What's not to like except the more and more absurb plot and Danny's disturbing appearances? Actually I love most medical dramas. ER, House, Medical Investigations, CSI (all 3 of it)...hmm.

3. I'm fascinated with ancient Chinese costumes. Hence me watching TVB's period drama series like Lady Yang and War and Beauty, etc. Actually fine, I like quite a few of them TVB series.

4. Big Milo fan. So big that I bought a bag to UK, had another big bag shipped, had a mate get me a bag when he heads back here and bought a 1kg tin from the Asian grocery store...all within my first 3 months here.

5. Am an affectionate person. I love my hugs and kisses. A lot. And cuddling? Its tops. =)

6. I wish I could, but I don't enjoy alcohol all that much. It doesn't taste or feel good to me. I just get from nothing to too hot and my head throbs and I grow sleepy and then I'd want to throw up. Zero to drunk isn't exactly nice.

7. I'm terrible. I can sleep everywhere. I'm that notorious person at the back of every lecture snoozing away. My parents paid for me to sleep through uni, ha. Being able to get away with it and still do well is crazy. I can sleep on your bed. On a library table. On the bus. The plane. But I don't sleep at night til I'm 2 ticks away from dropping and drooling from lack of sleep.

8. So I'm not a morning person. I'm in a daze and in my own world in the mornings. Don't talk to me. I'll talk to you when I want to and feel like it.

9. I used to be fat. (What, you mean you're not now?!) Yep. At 5'1" I was a size UK 14. That's pretty terrible. One day some superstrength epiphany came over me and I thought enough was really enough. So over 8 months I walked and starved myself down 40lbs (20kg). I cannot and will not put myself through that again. Like I said, it was superstrength. Now I'm back to puny laziness.

10. Because of that, I was teased through school. I had a lot of issues with self-esteem, self-image and confidence. But I wasn't mousy. I was bitchy and defensive. I hurt before I was hurt. That was my modus operandi. No boys ever looked at me. I still have the leftover baggage haunting me (in every sense) but I try to move on and away from all that now. But I think some scars are for life.

11. I get really really bad food cravings, I discover. Right now I'm hankering after nasi lemak, yam cake and my mom's cooking.

12. My favourite fruit is mango. Mango on its own. Mango pudding. Mango cake. Mango scented shower gel. Mango anything. Bring it on.

13. I never remember song lyrics or movies plots. Literally in, and out.

14. I don't have the concentration to read anymore like I used to :(

15. Total Internet junkie. I need to seek help.

16. I love going places and seeing how other people live. Traveling remains my life's passion. I think Bangkok with Gianne, and Penang with the girls would probably be really good memories I'll keep for life.

17. I'm a WYSIWYG person. No bullshit from me.

18. So...I rarely wear make up, dressing up is fun but not a daily affair and sneakers remain my footwear of choice (because I can't wear flip-flops in this weather can I?!). It's not that I don't like to look good, I just can't be bothered most of the time.

19. I think my dream is to run a cafe or B&B by the sea somewhere watching tourists go by, and close up during off-peak season and travel.

20. I have bad, bad hand-eye and hand-body-leg coordination. I'm clumsy. I'm klutzy. I'm awkward. I'm not comfortable with my own body. Therefore I suck at games, team sports, posing for pics and salsa-ing. General dancing too. However, swimming is good. Swimming is fine. Swimming is solo.

21. I've got no talent in anything, but I think I can write. I hope I'm not delusional about that.

22. I'm bad with budget (you're forewarned).

23. I think I'm really, really picky with my choice of men. Therefore my perpetual singlehood.

24. Not many people know I'm short-sighted. Not many people's seen me with glasses, heck.

25. I'm actually, really shy. I borrow confidence from people I'm with. So the times I actually do approach people and ask, I amaze myself. I'm always too embarassed and shy to do so. Not directions though; I'm capable of asking for directions, ha.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Pan mee


Today, like many true blue Malaysian foodies, I had four (4) [empat] 四 meals. I'll stress, worry and moan about it tomorrow.

Because today, I got ready for bed at 10pm. And the moment I hit the pillow, my mind was filled with the wonderful images of pan mee. The ones I regularly eat from the dirty stall in Maluri. The kick ass ones my mom made. I couldn't kick the images away. It kept coming back. So I started wondering.

Is it possible...?

I have no minced meat to make the wonderful minced meat we pour generously onto the bowl of noodles with. Am I desperate enough to go down to Tesco's, get a boxful of beef mince, use a spoonful and throw the rest of £4 away? Not really.

I have no sweet potato leaves, which is possibly the soul of the soup.

I have no pan mee noodles, of course, and I don't have flour or the finesse needed to make noodles from scratch.

But I have dried shiitake mushrooms! I have wonderful, wonderful ikan bilis. I have noodles with similar chewy, eggy texture of pan mee.

I nicked someone's half chicken breast and minced it. I've a bagful of rocket-watercress-spinach salad and decided I cannot be picky in the wrong continent.

And I am craving pan mee at 10pm.

Do I remember how to make the minced meat and shiitake mushrooms? Huh. After watching my mom do it every other weekend for the better part of my life, you fkin bet.

And this, this is something I hadn't had since September. This stuff is even better than the ones my mom use in her kitchen, because it's the bigger, cheaper kind, the kind we get from hawkers and kopitiams (sorry mom!)

THIS. This is the no-fail, craving-satisfying bowl of steaming pan mee, and pretty true to my mom's version (plus modifications).

Ahhh. I am a very happy person.

And yes, so happy that I felt compelled to blog about it. Now I can sleep happy.

*Sighs in deeeeeep satisfaction*

Thursday, January 22, 2009


From Paulo Coelho:

“The Soul of the World is nourished by people's happiness. And also by unhappiness, envy, and jealousy. To realize one's Personal Legend is a person's only real obligation. All things are one. And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”

“Waiting is painful. Forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worse kind of suffering.”

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”

“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. A week is more than enough time for us to decide whether or not to accept our destiny.”

“Be brave. Take risks. Nothing can substitute experience.”

“I think that perhaps we always fall in love the very first time we see the man of our dreams, even though, at the time, reason may be telling otherwise, and we may fight against that instinct, hoping against hope that we won't win, until there comes a point when we allow ourselves to be vanquished by our feelings...”

“Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dream.”

“I think that when we look for love courageously, it reveals itself, and we wind up attracting even more love. If one person really wants us, everyone does. But if we're alone, we become even more alone. Life is strange.”

“You have to take risks. We will only understand the miracle of life fully when we allow the unexpected to happen.”

“Everything that happens once can never happen again. But everything that happens twice will surely happen a third time.”

“The moment of that kiss contained every happy moment I had ever lived.”

“The wise are wise only because they love. The fool are fools only because they think they can understand love.”

“One is loved because one is loved. No reason is needed for loving.”

“Pitiful is the person who is afraid of taking risks. Perhaps this person will never be disappointed or disillusioned; perhaps she won't suffer the way people do when they have a dream to follow. But when the person looks back-she will hear her heart”

“Love can consign us to hell or to paradise, but it always takes us somewhere.”

“You drown not by falling into a river, but by staying submerged in it.”

“You can become blind by seeing each day as a similar one. Each day is a different one, each day brings a miracle of its own. It's just a matter of paying attention to this miracle.”

“But there is suffering in life, and there are defeats. No one can avoid them. But it's better to lose some of the battles in the struggles for your dreams than to be defeated without ever knowing what you're fighting for.”

“Every blessing ignored becomes a curse”

“No one can lie, no one can hide anything, when he looks directly into someone's eyes.”

"Why do we have to listen to our hearts?" "Because, wherever your heart is, that is where you'll find your treasure."

"Freedom is not the absence of commitments, but the ability to choose--and commit myself to--what is best for me."

"We all have the ability…we just don't all have the courage to follow our dreams and to follow the signs."

"We wouldn't worry nearly as much about what others thought of us if we recognize how seldom they do."

"Join with those who sing songs, tell stories, enjoy life … because happiness is contagious. Join those who walk with their heads high even when they have tears in their eyes. Avoid those who … have never shed a tear..."

Damn, I love this man.

Sunday, January 11, 2009



I know I've been unhappy to a point where friends start worrying about me. Really worrying. But let's put things into perspective, yah.

-Men (or the lack thereof)
-Being sick all the time

-When I meet people I know and I can smile and chat with them
-When I hang out in the ultra modern, airy, huge Information Commons using and abusing its facilities
-When I shop, make and eat good food
-Grocery shop!
-Watching people being stupid drunk on West Street any given night of the week
-Being here, halfway across the world
-New experiences, sights and sensations
-Traveling up and down this great cold country
-The friends I've made
-The friends I still have and will have for many years and many more years to come
-The person I'm learning to be
-Being broke = finding alternatives
-Ending the day knowing I've been a little productive
-Snapping photos and seeing how great they turn out to be
-Snapping photos and lamenting over the dud ones
-When my friends made me food and hand-delivered it to me, and text me to ensure I'm still alive
-When I text my flatmate and he came to my rescue
-When I feel better and the world feels round again
-Seeing people hold hands, all the love I'm surrounded by
-Knowing in the end I have a home and people I love to turn to

Yeah....why am I unhappy again? Me being human meant I've let the bad things overshadow the rest of the (many) good ones. All these good aspects of my life, I don't think I have a right to be unhappy at all.
So, going to give myself one hard smack and snap out of it.

Thank you guys for loving me, you know who you are.

Thursday, January 08, 2009


I've never had to think so much about my body and health til I came to this blasted, freezing country.

-Bouts of horrid, shiver-inducing, sweat-drenching feverish, hacking, sniffling colds once every 2-3 weeks fucking up my immune system royally
-Gastric pain requiring me to run around asking if people have Antacid at home (maybe I should start carrying some)
-Really really cranky (as in I lose temper and snap at people, literally) and not being able to focus if I uh well, miss a meal or don't eat at proper hours
-Wonky cycles
-Random nosebleeds
-Low energy levels

Okay. Time to get my 22-year old healthy body and immune system back!