Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Talents and gifts

Time: 00:20

For once, there are a few things I wanna put in today.

Okay. If you haven't read my previous blog, please, do so. For some unknown reason, I cared about William enough to maintain contact with him by sending him a couple of SMSes, asking him to let me know if anything good turned out from the coverage he'd been given. He did message me today saying some people want to meet him but when I asked him how was the meeting, he didn't reply. I didn't prod though. I hope it didn't turn out badly for him. He's had enough.

About this blog-switching thing...I've been given some flack (and amazement) from people about the fact that I've put in effort to copy-and-paste 4 years worth of blogs. Some wondered why did I bother. Truth is, I didn't really read my older blogs from when I was 17, 18. There was a time long ago when I was embarassed to look at my own credits, my own words, my own bylines. Like I'm almost ashamed because I've bared myself and my writing to the world. I'm not sure how to explain that, it's an almost innate sense of shame and insufficiency, like, I'm not good enough, y'know? Before the reassurances start pouring in (I know I have lotsa good friends out there who believed in me) I guess all along I do know I am okay at this. At writing. I am constantly surprised to find out words do not simply string together and being able to spell do not come from looking at the words enough times - the very thing I've been doing for years. And I personally feel four years worth of wearing my heart on my sleeves' too good to be forgotten. To me, It'll be a waste to erase the records of my life.

Some people can paint, some people make beautiful music, and others yet can craft beautiful things out of nowhere, some other people can run and swim but I...I can string words together. And I'm at peace with the fact that I cannot draw a straight line, much less a straight stick figure. But I can put words together. The only self-doubt lingering in me is that..."But mom, so many people can write. What makes me special?" Til this day, I still downplay what I can do (and try not to reveal what I cannot). I don't want to turn out to be one of those people who have maybe a little talent and then toot their horns loudly everywhere only to be taken down a peg or two ...self-praise is no praise to me.

I've told an editor before, my shyness is an obstacle in being a journalist, indeed, I'm a writer more than a reporter. He told me what I already knew - that in order to be a good writer, one must know and have seen a lot of things so that one can put in depth and perception in one's writing. Eloquence and profoundness do not just appear out of thin air.

I'm not one of the most patient people on fact, exasperated friends of mine would probably tell you I am freakin' impatient. When I say "go!" I really mean go, and I hate waiting for anyone to dawdle...and I am still learning to not feel annoyed when lunch is beckoning and someone is bound to say "wait, ya...wait..let me finish this.." I would sacrifice better quality to speed of which I write my articles, check and send in so that I can be done and get out fast, which I realise is not the best way to write because I've left out vital facts and screwed up before. Like, I've written a long-ish article last night and quickly sent it in so that I can go home before midnight and today on the way home after work, I realised I omitted some stuff which will otherwise make that article even better. I swear, I'm going to learn to be a little bit more patient and detailed while writing my stories.

I had a 6pm assignment yesterday at the Australian High Commissioner's Residence and I was there an hour early to avoid the city centre congestion. Sitting at the kitchen watching the cooks prepare food, I watched the front gates from their vantage windows and saw people started pouring in. The gathering was for the 60th anniversary of a nursing scholarship set up by WWII Australian prisoners of war who were captured and imprisoned in Changi. It is in memorial of fellow soldiers who did not return home. They also wanted to thank the people of Malaya for helping them and risking their own lives while doing so. I went there intimidated (all these big, white people from the Australian High Commissioner! Me, a small minion of an intern of a reporter!) and not sure what angle I should approach from the story when Vivienne Pal, a reporter from Metro section, told me I could interview the two PoW who was there. One of them is 86, the other 84.

I was so humbled. And honoured. I wonder what is it like to be in their shoes, serving during WWII and being captured by the Japanese and incarcerated in Changi. What is it like to do bitter, forced labour at the Burma-Siam railways. My generation who knew nothing but peace and MTV and nothing else at all...that, and a few other things too long to write here is quickly becoming a turning point.

A fuel, a re-focus and a motivation for me to the right thing for me. I realise how influential the media can entire nation reading about things I've seen and wrote about...and my feelings about human rights. I can't wait to go back to school, finish it, and embrace what my future will bring me.

I think I might have found my aim in life.

Have I written half a novel here? Opps.

Friday, March 23, 2007

Your Right.

Time: 23:33

Article 15 (1) of United Nation's Universal Declaration of Human Rights reads:
Everyone has the right to a nationality.

Article 15 (2) of United Nation's Universal Declaration of Human Rights reads:
No one shall be arbitrarily deprived of his nationality nor denied the right to change his nationality.

And here is my story:

He has no name.

An alien in his own country, he could not hold a permanent job simply because he do not the proper documentations to.

He has no citizenship, no nationality and no identity.

He could not remember his parents or his childhood at all, other than the undeserved abuse he suffered.

His body still bears the scars, a grim reminder of his painful, unknown past.

15 years ago, when he was only a child of eight, he was left for death along Jalan Ampang after a particularly brutal beating. Just like a stray dog.

Police found him and sent him to Kuala Lumpur Hospital where he was warded for seven months. When he recovered, the welfare department sent him to an orphanage in Kajang where he was raised.

There, he was given the name William, and it is the only name he has.

With the orphanage's help, he managed to obtain a birth certificate at age 15. The columns where his parents' names should occupy were left void.

"Insufficient information," the blanks said.

He acquired a green IC (only applicable for working permit holders and foreigners born in Malaysia and is lower in status than the red IC denoting Permanent Resident status) in 2004, only to lose it after being a victim of snatch thief, along with his driving license, hand phone and cash.

It's as though his circumstances are hard to improve because the government stopped issuing green IC (too many forgery cases), and William was forced to carry his birth certificate with him everywhere.

He also could not replace his driving license without his IC.

Although he has applied for permanent residence in 2004 and citizenship two years later, the status of his application remains unclear.

Hardly surprising, knowing how slow the system works in our beloved nation.

To sit for his PMR and SPM, he had to obtain letters from the National Registration Department to submit to the Education Ministry.

Despite the odds, he finished Form Five and worked odd jobs to support himself after leaving the orphanage. He is a slight, average height and sized, articulate and polite boy.

With such a hard past, it is ironic William is currently working as an entertainer in Sunway Lagoon Theme Park, bringing laughter to the visiting crowds daily.

He said, he manned game booths, dressed up in costumes, make funny noises (he does amazing imitations of Donald Duck) and organise family days for corporations or groups of people in the theme park.

He said he loved making people laugh, and cited the ability as God's gift.

As a 21 year-old part-timer and earning only RM600 to RM700 a month, he is barely making ends meet.

Living alone, he has no criminal records and worked hard to support himself and contribute to the country.

All he wanted sincerely is to gain his right to be a citizen of the country he was born in.

If you can help William, please contact the MCA Public Service and Complaints department at 03-2161 8044.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

I went to his press conference this afternoon where I learnt of his sordid story and found out he has no last name, cannot hold a job legally. has no voting rights, no insurance and no access to a lot of things we, as citizens of Malaysia, took for granted. I wrote his story with a degree of sadness and anger.

I felt very strongly about this issue – as the UN decreed, citizenship is one of the fundamental rights of a human being. He was denied even that. I feel our government has failed him, as he has worked hard to eek out a living without resorting to stealing, begging or depending on social welfare help. I feel disgusted. And sad. This is something I learnt from him. Never, ever, take something so fundamental, so simple for granted. Because there are people here that don’t even have that.

I want to help him, but I know there's only so much I can do. Shah, one of the editors, told me, the best way I can help him is to write his story, and write it so that it reaches out and touches the cold, indifferent, hardened human hearts out there. Wrote I did, though I'm not sure I've done him justice. I hope it is enough. Because he, as I, is a Malaysian and there is no question about it.

bidding adieu

Time: 18:21

295 blogs later...

664 comments later...

64,209 hits later...

For the final time, I blog from blog-city.

Started since 21 April 2003, it has served as the most basic of blogs, a wee space in the cyberworld to call my own, my whine-page, my vent-page, my sanity, my insanity, my thought, announcements and expressions.

Now almost 4 years later, with the announcement that blog-city will start charging end of this year, I've finally moved to blogger, of which I already have an account since 2005.

Day by day, with only 50 blogs allowed every 24 hours, I've patiently copy and paste texts I deem to precious to just see go wasted to my new blog (during office) hours. Now the tedious process is done and my business here is finished.

I beg your kindness and some time to change my blog URL to this and do visit me there.

I thank ALL of ya for the time to read, to share and to console me and I hope I will still have your care, love and time in days to come.

Again, my NEW BLOG @

Pui Yee

what's going down with the world today

16 Mar 2007
Time: 10:44

There is one matter that I've not spoken about and will hesitate to mention to anyone. One evening at work few days, I passed by the editors' meeting where they decide what goes in to tomorrow's paper and saw something awful on the huge projector.

I ran to my workstation to load them as well. What I saw broke my heart and made me cry.

It was pictures upon pictures of dead Thais in a minivan.

They were Buddhists killed by Muslim insurgents.

Why? For what it's worth? Because they're of different creeds?

What did they do? What was their crime so bad that they were shot at the back of their heads, one by one?

In death, they look so vulnerable, so unprotected, so small, so ordinary. The pictures weren't gory. It was the pale, dead faces hanging from their seats, men and women with numbers tagged to their heads using bright yellow markers, being hauled and laid side by side on the road, with their legs and hands bloodstained and some without shoes on...and a pair of navy sneakers still worn by a white socked man.

The pictures disturbed me. I will not, and am sure I'm not allowed to post them here. The photos belonged to Reuters and no one in their sane mind should see what I've seen. It ate to my conscious, knowing such terrors grip people so near me. Nobody knows what will happen tomorrow, but I at least, can know for sure, no one will shoot me dead for my religion where I am.

I can still feel tears stinging at the back of my eyes whenever those photos float into my mind, and that's happening pretty frequently.

To add salt to the wound, I went and watch 300 yesterday. It was a gory, blood-soaked movie of King Leonidas and his Spartan war-hardened fighters battling against Xerxes, a self-proclaimed God King of Persia.

Every gross CGI-rendered drop of blood, flying head, tight torso, spear-stabbed army reminded me painfully that years ago, atrocities like this are probably real, and today is still happening somewhere else in the world. I tried to block the thoughts out of my mind, but truth is, I am sobered throughout the movie. And that evening, another terrorist admitted to slaying Daniel Pearl, an American journalist 6 years ago. How many people still remember Pearl for that matter? This morning, news of suicide bombers killing policemen in Baghdad rang on the radio of my car.

Nobody deserve to die this way. All of them, every single dead person, anonymous to our media-weary and hardened eyes, is someone's loved on, someone's son, daughter, spouse, child, friend. When will we start appreciating lives? When we have to travel in groups and watch our backs constantly?

Inside we are all the same. We all believe in our Gods and should be allowed this freedom to believe in what we choose to. For every comedy we watch on tv, every reality tv drama, every concert, every series, there are people out there whose lives are gripped by terror and fear.

Those thoughts are eating into my conscience so badly, so badly.

On the other hand: a person wrote to the Editor at The Star commenting about the two brilliant girls who scored 16A1s and wanted to be doctors.

He lauded them not for their SPM results, rather, their ambitions.

He cited passion as the moving factors in them gaining what they did. that passion fueled and nurtured them into single-mindedly pursuing their dreams. That they and everyone else should listen to their heart and heed the little voice in their heads.

That passion is the one factor that will move seas and mountains. Without passion, no driving force can lead a person to be where he or she wants to be.

And I agree whole-heartedly. That passion is what we all need to achieve our ambitions, ideals, dreams and the best we can be. Passion decides where we stand on this earth.

Passion drives us to work hard, to seize every opportunity and day, find a way to get what we want. Passion.

blog-city, you blow

11 Mar 2007
Time: 13:21

Blog-city announced recently they're going to charge users to use their software.

Gianne told me, let's migrate to blogspot or somewhere soon. But ...shifting 3 years worth of blogs? With each and every of them having sentimental values. And photos, of course.

I thought, okay, let's not blog anymore, and try out (seriously this time) blogspot and try messing with the codes and all to get a cop on how it feels like there. Afterall, there's nothing much I can do anymore about this. All I'm saying is: Will serve blog-city right when all their users goes off in search of greener (and free) pastures.

But this entry I cannot and will not resist:

In this age where honesty and chivalry are no longer expected from the public in general, I am extremely grateful to have some of my faith in fellow Malaysians restored.

On Saturday afternoon, I called in sick, (actually seen a doctor for Hep B jab) and went to Huang Ah Ma Restaurant in Taman Usahawan Kepong for lunch with my mom and brother. So being the usual me, I carelessly left my wallet on the table and left to pay for the meal at the faraway cashier.

I went home, slept, and watched tv with my mom til 1am, and with a sinking ehart, found my freaking wallet missing. 1am!

My ID, driving license, credit card and ATM cards! Deja vu from two years ago! I lost it inside Kim gary two years ago and no one bothered to even send me my IC, fucker.

Knowing it was already too late as anyone who picked up my wallet could've went for a shopping spree and maxed out my card already, all I could do was to pray, and pray hard that I would be able to at least get back my personal documents.

It was a skeptic's prayer and the hassle of cancelling my cards and getting replacements for my personal documents was an epic in itself, to say the least.

So imagine my surprise and gratefulness when I went to the restaurant first thing this morning and had my wallet returned to me after being asked to give a thorough description of my wallet and its contents. To the owner and employees of Huang Ah Ma Restaurant, I give you my deepest gratitude for your honesty and integrity.

And ehem, the food there is not bad. They're pan mee specialists and have a few kinds of pan mee to try...and their fried dumplings are yummy.

Their address:
16 & 18, Jalan Metro Perdana 8
Taman Usahawan Kepong, Kepong Utara
52100 Kuala Lumpur

They're beside Carrefour Kepong and across from Jusco Kepong.

So if you ever eat there, remember, the food there are prepared by honest people with integrity and sincerity.

Jun Hoe made this comment,
Yeah, I'm peeved too. Blog-city really pisses me off now. Of all the times I ignored their bugginess and such.
Btw, I really like pan mee. Haven't had a good one for a long time now, and it's quite hard to find one these days. Maybe next time u could take me there? Hehe..

animals are us

7 Mar 2007
Time: 11:23

I'm breaking the silence.

If you've read the papers lately, a baby elephant was consficated from a local themepark and transfered to Malacca Zoo.

His ribcage and shoulder blades would be the envy of supermodels everywhere.

He weigh will make those models swoon further.

He was starved and weighed only 40+ kg.

Boys and girls, babies and elephants. While I am no self-professed environmentalist, things like this anger me. Apparently this theme park has a bad track record. One wonder how many animals died from negligence while passing through its doors. The leashes they tighten around the animals' necks sealed their death certificates.

They are animals in captivity, unable to fend and feed themselves. They were ripped from their homes and can no longer go back because their homes has been decimated and they are no longer capable of hunting or looking for their sustenence. Or they are born in captivity, never knowing what is it like to be free, roaming as generations before them had.

Sometimes, I'm disgusted with the notion of human life. What are we? Who are we? Watch the Discovery ad...each species in the world depend on each other for survival. Yet none of them, not a single one of them, need to depend on us, human beings, for existence. We depend on them. And look how we treat them.

By the way. The baby elephant was sent to Malacca Zoo directly from the theme park it was seized from. That theme park is not far from the zoo. Which one, ever wondered? Go figure, folks. Even their holiday packages ad repulse me now.

On another note, I've had writers' block trying to write my weekly report on internship. This is because last Saturday, I had a terrible experience on one of my assignments. I was sent to a cheque persentation event in the city and it was scheduled to be at 10am on the 15th floor of that building. I arrived at 9.30am, went straight to 15th floor and was greeted by an embassy...and men, all men on the other doorway. I backed out and ran straightdown. There was nobody manning the reception.

So, I called back to the office to double check (who knows, I got the building wrong or the timing wrong, right?) but demmit, I got it correct. So I looked floor by floor desperately and thank goodness, found a reception on the 4th floor. After making some calls, the lady informed me the function is there, but is at 11am. WTF. So I sat and slept at a corner and got up at 10.50am to check on the venue and saw a screen saying the event is scheduled for 11.30am.


At 11.25am, I hovered in front of the doorway but nobody gave me a hoot so I walked in and sat and everyone else was in blazers and dressed very nicely. Hooboy, what is this? I wondered.
It was one of those Multi-level Marketing networks, one thing in life I hate with infuriating passion. Hoo boy. So I sat there alone, miserable, cold and hating it and when the event's over, I thought I should approach the she-emcee to verify a few fact, cos she had the paper and the attending VIP list, right?

That she-satan thought I was late when I introduced myself and I didn't correct her. I asked if she could print of make a copyof the VIP list and she snotily asked "Why? You can't copy?" I asked if she said "expo" or "exhibition" and she condenscendingly exclaimed "Expo is exhibition lah!" Best part, she told me to go back to the office to do my homework. And then she demand for my name, and said "You better not misquote me, I have your name. I know where to find you."

I was already pissed about the hour and half wait, and floor-by-floor search and now this she-devil? WTF!

She proceed to tell me what I can and cannot put in my article, and even told me "no, you stay here, let me explain.." in a patronising tone, and I raised my hand, stopped her and told her I've got what I need. She insisted on explaining but my temper snapped, I stopped her again and turned to go. She called to my back, "Next time, please be on time!"

That was it. I turned, managed to smile, and said, "You know what, I was here since 9.30am because your people told my paper the event starts at 10am."

She was taken aback, paused and recovered quickly. And gawd, she even said, "Well, then, why do you approach me and ask me all those then? You've seen everything, right?"

Fook her! Pui Yee got screwed by a she-satan-emcee!

I was boiling but I couldn't lose it so the drive back to office, I try not to dwell on it and when I briefed my editor about my assignment, I turned and started...crying. I guess I was shaken up and angry and felt injustified (?) because it all started with the base assumption that I was late in that she-bitch's mind.

..That was a chapter in the life of Pui Yee, student journalist.


Yesterday 12 European and Indian publishers visited our office (Ifra they call themselves) and thanks to my kaypoh-ness I followed them around and went to the multimedia department. Correction: I discovered the multimedia department exists! I saw a studio with cameras and a board and turntables...whoa. mean, and then the dept head said I could go upstairs and learn from them if I want to.

Well the letter's been written and printed, I think I'm extending my internship too.

*Says a little prayer*


27 Feb 2007
Time: 14:33

Allow me to pay tribute to one of the greatest inventions on the Internet:

The one, the only, the famous...


Ta da da da da!

It is here that I've whiled away many, many, many hours of boredom at work, reading up on Chinese Cuisine of which I made a project out of - read em categorically and systematically. Also methods of execution, internment...burials, cremations, funerals..

Vestal Virgins, Savage Garden, Nickelback, Delta Goodrem, American Idol, Oprah Winfrey...songs, books, food. Art pieces.

The opening and closing ceremony of Melbourne 2006 Commonwealth Games. Profile of Perodua. Proton, The Star.

Practically every single word you key into their search engine, it will pull something up. I've never been disappointed (much).


*tap tap tap*

Voila! Answer!

You know why it's fun? Not only they are comprehensive, they link you to other relevant (and irrelevant) topics, they have categories and graphics, fact boxes and lists, and they're usually pretty accurate. And they're easy and fun to read.

They're shorter than textbooks, they are explained in layperson's terms, and its basically my first-stop to any information I might need...and more importantly they contain stuff I never knew about, or heard about but never put heart to it. It's a treasure trove, baby!

I heart Wikipedia!

eppy effin chinese new year, folks

25 Feb 2007
Time: 09:10

Sunday morning - alone in the office (almost).

My last entry was Feb 7th?! *slack jaw* I see I've slacked. As usual.

I guess I could say its just more and more days of routine, assignments, late nights and the usual stuff. Happy to report no life-changing event happened and I am still safe and sound. ( this a happy thing?)

Before CNY, for the first time I was sent to stake out and it was at Albert Mah's wake in Nirvana Memorial Centre in Sungai Besi. I discover, Gawd, I suck at KL road directions. Cos I have absolutely no head nor tail on HOW to to go Sungai Besi without going through the (congested) city centre. Thank God for Aizat.

We waited there. Specifically, I descend upon one of their square shaped, modern couches and slept. We waited. And we waited. And whadyaknow? Nobody showed up.

Boring, can?

The pixman showed up and we took some pleasure in the one activity we're apt at - camwhoring. I snapped the pixman cleaning out his camera lenses with shirt, I snapped Meikeng from MySpaceAngles (meaning, all angles) and of the flowers and the huge gaudy crystal ball in front of the entrance.

The next day, at the laaaaast minute, I was sent to his funeral service in St Paul's Church nearby the office. The parking was was jam-packed and worst, there's so many cops around (well, Mah was a cop in service for 35 years), it gives me the crawls. Especially when I experienced firsthand how sleazy and sonoabitch-like they can be when they evade questions from the Chinese press journalists.

Then there was a day when we went to the National Museum to cover the CNY exhibition going on there and I made a wish on the wishing pond. I don't remember my wish now; but its not about getting a boyfriend (don't want to waste a good wish), jeesh. There was a row of wishing trees. I remember I wanted to make a wish there, too. Superstitious, huh.

Faridah fall really, really ill that day and I was amazed and truth was I admired her resillence and a fair amount of stubbornness cos even in pain, she took us for lunch and made it back to the office before we finally, successfully, make her go to an emergency room. She's recovering at home now, so I hope she'll be on her legs and back in the office soon.

CNY was quiet. Spent it in KL where, you know, apart from fireworks and the occasional lion dance troupe, nothing happened. There was a lot of good food. A lot. And I ate a lot of those good food. A lot. Hooboy. I am feeling and looking fatter than usual. And yeah, it's ALL my fault. All mine.

Ang pao collection dropped. By about 50%. I couldn't recoup what I spent right before new year. Oh, before new year, I went to the Curve with Amelia for pancakes and shabu-shabu (read about her entry and feast on some photos on her blog) and some new year shopping, and I spent too much that day. The next day, I bought not one, but TWO CDs.

And Day 4 of new year was spent going to Gianne's house and an old classmate, Jacinth's. I took the KTM to Bank Negara and it was very packed and I was infuriated with this guy hogging an entire pole in the middle of the carriage. He leaned his entire upper body on it, leaving no space for other shorties (like me) to hold onto it. I insisted and he grinded his body on my hand, trying to get me to let go. What the fuck, right? How inconsiderate can he be to pole dance and then try to make people let go? I was so pissed, I told him off (very nicely in my book) and he gave me a blank look, turned around, and proceed to re-lean his upper body on the pole. Whoa, my anger level then was unbelievably high. And when he leave the train, he actually had the guts to grab his girlfriend (a nearby pole hogger/pole dancer) and said loud enough for everyone to hear: what a fierce bitch. Moi? Fierce?! For doing what 70% other Malaysians won't? By asking you to be more considerate? What's wrong with us people nowadays?!

Things like that could spoil an entire day, bah.

Okay lah, for the first time in history I stepped into Gianne's house and immediately fall in love with her dog Milo. I think it was Milo. Oy, Gianne, the small one's Milo, right? Careful, I know where you live. I'm going to abduct her one day.

Last night, on the way to Amelia's house to watch a chick flick, I was running late and was at the traffic lights at a crossroad and from my left, I saw a really old man on an equally old bicycle swaying precariously across the road and mid-way, the lights turned red for him and green for us. He was still swaying in the middle of the road! He upped his pace a little and rode to where he wanted to, only he was at the wrong side of the road after. Surprisingly, I found humour in that.

Watching chick flick with the girls is always fun and the self-videorecording after, even more so. We actually put A Whole New World on Melia's laptop, and Shwu Chenn recorded her being Aladdin (complete with turban and Superman-cape) and I was a giggly Jasmine. If that video ever ended up in YouTube? I have some ex-girlfriends to murder, I'm going to tell you in advance. But it did give us couple of hours of clean entertainment.

Maybe I will post pictures on my next entry soon. Before this turns into a boring, monotonous account on my not-very-exciting life, I bid you adieu and Happy Chinese New Year!

PS: This was what happened in the office today and Meikeng blogged about it:

pui yee and i have been trying to squeeze an angpau out of one of our favourite editors.
so we keep wishing him "gong hei fatt choy!" everytime we see him.
he will just roll his eyes and ignore us.
since today we were so wasted and bored out of our minds, it had slipped us to wish him.
so when he came around us and we were silent, he went like, "eh, why no gong hei fatt choy?"
ahahahaha...! =P
i'm sorry, i couldn't help it.

I might add, that darned ang pao is still not forthcoming.

Oh, oh, and on my first day back to the job, I received a pretty hilarious phone call. It was bright and early in the morning, I was at a loss and had to stand in and take calls and this guy from a trade council called and asked if we've received his fax on an event. I ransacked the entire events folder and found his fax and told him yes, we received it and was going to hang up. Unfortunately the guy went on to ask if we will send any reporter over and I said I'm not sure, it's up to the editor and he will only decide the night before the event. He still didn't hang up and proceeded to do the worst thing he could think of to an intern: he name dropped.

Him: Your editor's still Sai Wan?
Me: Yes
Him: We're his good friends.
Me: Ok
Him: Who is your editor today? Is it Cheng Ho?
Me: He's still on New Year leave.
Him: Oh he's my good friend too.
Me: Ok
Him: And who's your other editor? Who's in charge today?
Me: Esther
Him: Oh I know Esther too, we're good friends.
Me: Uh, ok
Him: And, that Dato ...Dato...Wong?
Me: *bored voice* Wong Chun Wai
Him: Yes! Yes him. He's our good friend too.
Me: Ok. So?
Him: Can you make sure you send a reporter to my event?
Me: I'll let the editors know, alright? *racing to hang up the phone*
Him: Are you authorised to send a reporter?
Me: Huh? No. I'm only answering phones today. I'll let them know, alright? Hang up already!
Him: I'm good friends with your paper! Make sure you send people!
Me: Will let the editors know. *yells and tears hair from scalp*

So on and so forth til I actually managed to end the call. Talk about persistence! If he's such good friends with everyone like he claimed, why don't he make personal calls to them? Jeesh.

Lil anecdotes like this make working life fun, innit!

Feb 27
Time: 11:47

'Fetched' from Meikeng's blog:

he has finally given in!
after all the enthusiastic "gong hei fatt choy!" wishes everytime our fav editor steps into our radar, pui yee and i have finally triumphed!
today, after saying it again with a wide, cheeky grin, he sighed and said, "haiyah, oklah oklah... everyone go to the mamak, it's on me."
pui yee, kenneth, aizat, "fresh meat" ivan and i cheered in sheer joy!
lam has submitted to our wishes! *insert evil laughter*
and so, my breakfast of a warm cup of teh tarik and mee goreng was courtesy of my funny and lovable editor and i thank him for it.
his parting words from the mamak?
"this batch of interns ah..terrible one!"
pui yee...cepat, next victim!

Pui Yee says: Cheng Hoe! SheN Li!

my obligation

7 Feb 2007
Time: 10:25

Here. I am extremely obligated to do this:

Go to Gianne's blog NOW!


For she finally updated her blog for Singapore Xmas!

I'm helpin' her pimp out her blog so visit it now.

It's a long-awaited entry so go now.

You shall listen to me and go to her blog now.

Gianne has much funnier things to say about Singapore than I do.

So get yer asses there now.

By the way, Gianne is right. Why oh why did Malaysia copy the Eye on London and Eye on Dubai and came up with Eye on Malaysia in Lake Titiwangsa (where the view from up there is frankly not that spectacular anyway) using RM30mil, when many many places in KL are left in shambles and should be preserved, facelifted or at least given a new layer of paint.

Why oh why do we try to squeeze into the UNESCO World Heritage Site (well, Penang and Melacca are) when the architecturally breathtaking Bok House in the middle of KL, sorely in need of a reconstruction (preserve the facade, build a Bill Gates-approved smart home inside, turn it onto a restaurant, art house, gallery, wedding gallery for all I care) but why tear it down?

Why oh why a public consensus was never taken into account and the bulldozer bulldozes its way in. Why oh why are my fellow Malaysians so short-sighted? When oh when will we finally realise no matter how modern we try to be, whose country and their attractions we try to emulate, to downright imitate (and of course, we're full of imitations, Eye-not?), it will be our culture, the heritage, the buildings that prevailed hundreds of years that will remain our attraction.

Personally I really have contempt for all copying, the stuff that's not Malaysia original, then when we actually made it, built it, the maintainence given to these imitations are minimal at best, non-existent is more likely in most cases. I don't understand lor the glorified aplomp we accord to the new things and the derisive and dimissive way we sweep the ugly ones under the carpet. End of the day they still exist, right?

It's the same concept as your home: if you have new guests coming or Chinese New Year is around the corner and you spring clean, you chuck everything in the storeroom under the stairs and buy new furniture in IKEA and bedsheets from Aussino and curtains from Home Design and go to Macy's for table cloth. Sure, yer house is bedecked with new smells and sights and people will wow and admire, but if their kids cheekily open that store room door and out spew the mothballs and rags and dust from the past 30 years, the witness and testament of your residence at your house, the things time and you accumulate simply by existing and living life?

Utter humiliation innit?

That's my Malaysia lor.


5 Feb 2007
Time: 10:54

Another day at the office and looks like I'm assignment-less again. Meikeng gotta arrange this interview with Timo Muller, who's German and cycling through 14 countries for human rights. Yes my dear, a real-life 20-year-old human rights activist. And look at me, 20-year-old intern being blur and useless in the office.

Sometimes I feel like my life has very little meaning and significance. To the world, to myself, to changes, to a better cause. Days when it creeped upon me to ask: What the hell am I doing?!

We're all self-centred, of course, but I think I'm even more so. Look at the prefix "I" in the blog, for goodness sake. It's all about me and I and moi and ako and saya and mi.

Anyhoo, the fella's landing in Malaysia today and she get the job interviewing this really cool dude. I want to tag along! I want to me flesh-in-blood a better person than I am who is actually my age.

By the way, since I got razed for it pretty recently, I'm not the comment-leaving sort of person. So if you've dropped me 10 testimonials/messages in Myspace/Friendster/Blog and I didn't reply or return the gesture, it's not because I didn't go to your page or read your blogs, it's just that I'm...lazy, as usual, yo.

Thing is, I miss classes. I miss school. I miss the comfort and security and simplicity of all that. Working life ain't like that anymore. I'm school-sick! And I'm admitting it freely right now with my tail between my legs. Can I throw in a whimper?

Cos afterall, friends who know me, and know me well, know "friendly" is not my nature. This being someone else, someone civil, someone easy to talk to, someone friendly tires me. A lot of PR work on my part, a lot of skills that I think I learnt and somehow know inertly that I have to make full use of. This need of being sweet and smiling and empty greetings. Sigh. My natural inclination to being grumpy in the morning sometimes show. My temper hovers on the surface ready to raze at the worst opportune moment should the occasion arrive. Must. NOT. Let. Go.


It's only three months, I can tell myself now. Will be able to weather through it all. But after that? The next 30 years? It will be a living nightmare. I've been told recently to consider and deliberate very deeply if journalism is for me. My gut feeling said vehemently: "NO!"

Cos I know now, its not about going out to assignments and interviewing people that bothers me now. Now I can do and ask whatever I need to to get my story in. Now I know it's the PR and communications in the office that is the feared factor. Trust nobody, bite yer tongue and smile and play dumb. Office politics abound and tis not school. People will be happy to step on yer just for the pleasure of it. I'm lucky I've never been in a situation where people sabotage/manipulate to get what they want. But it's not school. I'm out of the incubator now.

And then I realise: How vulnerable, and how incredibly stupid, and naive we truly are.

I'm learning. Learning.

WQ made this comment,
hey girl, saw ur byline today ;)
hang in there!

Jun Hoe made this comment,
Yeah, can't trust people. That's why I work with animals - cos if they ever turned on you, they didn't scheme/manipulate/sabotage you just to gain a promotion/money etc. It's just what they are.


3 Feb 2007
Time: 09:09

This must be the earliest...EVER I've ever blogged. Well, earliest ever from the time I wake up to the point where I blog.

I woke up slightly less than hour ago. Within that span of time, I got dressed and sped to work. Only to find, well, as usual, no assignments. Not too sure I'm happy or sad about that means I can laze, but also mean it's another day of staying under the radar and do not much.

I can't believe in a month since I start work I'm already getting slovenly and lazy. This work is tiring, yo, and although I am happy about assignments and going out and the flexibility and the unpredictability, I just...well, sometimes I wonder where is this headed to.

There are many times I felt like blogging, but when I actually got to a computer, I'm just too tired to. Or too lazy. There are many things I'd like to say, to express, but all lost in time, because well, I didn't bother to.

One thing: Woohoooooohooooo to Zabrina and Jo Jer for winning Amazing Race Asia! Them spunky ladies are the first all-female team to win a race, ever, so women, I merakamkan setinggi-tinggi tahniah and man, you girls are inspiring! Makes it so, so, so sweet that they're Malaysians too.

The other day, I insisted on watching the midnight slot of American Idol and as it turns out, AI starts at 11pm. So when I rush downstairs at 11.15pm, my mom was hogging the tv on her usual spot and I just burst into tears. I'm not sure why, it's not big deal but I felt kinda hurt that she didn't call me although she's aware AI started. She gave me the remote control and I tuned into AI at 11.20pm...only to fall asleep somewhere in the region between 11.40pm and 11.50pm. My mom was like "jeesh what's wrong with you silly girl?!!"

I couldn't take it. I switched it off and went to bed.

The next day was a public holiday (not sure if it was thaipusam or FT holiday, but who cares?) so not many people were in the office and not only did I catch AI LA, I caught Heroes pilot, TWO Oprah Winfrey shows (one in the morning, the other at 1pm) and NCIS. I lose interest in soap operas General Hospital and the Bold and Beautiful. I'm going to buy Heroes DVD.

Oh. Yes. Wednesday when we got back from Batu Caves assignment, we went on the Pasar Seni LRT and Yee Nee and I were on the escalator, talking and pointing at the sights outside. Then after we left the escalator and took two steps, this fooker actually came on front of us and yelled us in Cantonese (he's not Chinese) that "why you don't use your brains? People want to use the escalator. The two of you stand there and hog the steps I cannot walk through, stupid".

I was so enraged, I yell back "hello, probably it's our fault, but why can't you say the word "excuse me" or something? If you said that we'd let you pass through. Don't yell after everyone got off the escalator. There's this whole stretch of opportunity and you said nothing and then decide to yell after we got off the escalator? What the hell is your problem?"

The only reply he gave was, "why should I say excuse me? Why didn't you use your brains? You have no brains!"

He yelled that again and again and again, and whadyaknow, for all his rush, we still ended up in the same LRT. Man, he is a bastard, a fooker and a sonnabitch.


*pant pant*

Climbing up Batu Caves was actually kind of spiritual. It helped I was going up and down all 17 floors of Menara Star cos there were 272 steps and I was only slightly out of breath. If I were to climb before I started internship, I probably would collapse at step 100. I was with all these people of another religion, piercing themselves, bringing milk, climbing the steps on the knees, crawling up - for thanksgiving, to make vows and wishes...the faith they have, their belief make me a little ashamed. I'm a person of little faith and would make no sacrifices, yet I could understand why they're doing this. I'm grateful that I actually did the Batu Caves assignment - otherwise I wouldn't be bothered to climb up and realise how beautiful the caves really are. Seriously, it's beautiful up there. I'd tell every single traveller passing by KL to go see Batu Caves.

Well, my girlfriends went to Singapore and came back. I half-wished I could go with them, cos I miss their company. Maybe not Singapore, I'd go with them to Bangkok or Bali or something, but sounded like they had a lot of fun. I'm stuck here and our schedules never really matched...but somehow, sometimes, I wonder if we coulda put more effort into trying. I feel slighted sometimes, left, do I mean much or not at all? And then there's the out-of-loop feeling. Sometimes I really let myself go out of the loop. Partly my fault; I'm lazy about calling and asking. But is it entirely my fault? Like I said, effort on our parts.

Went to Bukit Bintang yesterday with Gianne. She got this pair of cute boots that I'd never wear if I'm to buy it, but it looks good. We went to Tengkat Tong Shin to check out the backpackers' hostels there, and I wished so badly I'm part of that crowd, that life. But who knows, right?

Ask, and you shall receive.

Sometimes I think I think in circles. Narrow view of life, only from my, me, I point of perspective. That I should open up my horizons and accept variety and difference. That there are many ways to reach a goal and that compromising is part of life. Giving and taking, and thinking about alternatives. If I barge through life, I'll only make life hard for myself. I wished I'm a more discreet, subtle, sweeter-tempered and EQ-gifted person. Sometimes I wish I can manipulate my own facial expressions and join in the rat-race of pretenses and fakers, because you know why? They're the clever people, the smart ones who'll be able to move up and fast.

It takes time for people to warm up to me, and I to them, and not everyone has that time, or want to. Who am I afterall?

Amelia made this comment,
Aiyoh babeeee....don't feel out of the loop la. What loop. No loop wei. I'm having exams. Chenn is I don't home? Haha...Sing Yieng is non-existent. See no loop. Because we're not doing anything at all.
And how many times have I told you to be patient abit. After my exams then we can together gether go out. And honestly, alot of times I don't even know when you would be free. You need to ajak us out sometimes also la. Not only mamak sessions but kai kai sessions which I do sorely miss cos it seems like a gazillions years since we went out. At least you and Chenn get to like go to together. I on the other hand...I don't even remember. Since The Curve I think..Wanna go out with my girly wirlys! Kenny can take a back seat cos I need my girlfriends' attention. So please do not hesitate to call me out because I have a bf because that would totally break my widdle heart.

So yeah. Anyway my exam's tmr. Mamak on monday? Game or not? Here's a invitation! Yeay!

Sorry for the horrible manglish. I'm so freaking stressed out yo. EXAM TOMORROW!!

PLease don't kill me for the heavy note of perkiness in this comment yah.

Much love. Your best friend, Me. XD

beautiful malaysia

27 Jan 2007
Time: 21:44

Amazing Race Asia is starting in 15 minutes!

Its been a while since I blogged and I have a lot to say, and usually too tired to say anything...

"We all desire desperatedly to be desperatedly disired" (or something like that), heh.

It's at the back of some self-help love book that I pointed out to my brother and we had a good 30 seconds snickering away.

And er yeah today's my brother's birthday so, Eppy 18th, bro!

Okay, to business.

We went out to Shogun in 1U today for his bday dinner. I was so full, I walked out to their balcony on the 3rd floor to look at LDP outside. Anyone who has been to 1U would know the enw wing faces the bridge on LDP and it was a windy and humid night and Saturday traffic was frantic and it was dark and the headlights from the cars were twinkling and the sounds was ebbing and flowing and in the distance the billboards and huge displays of Tesco, Ikea and Ikano Power was lighted on the left and on the right, TTDI and Old Wing and the new hotel...

It was so beautiful I could stand there all night watching, watching, watching.

I didn't mind being alone. I was glad I was alone. It was, in quite some time, a "moment" for me to do nothing except being me, looking at the traffic, no worries, just me.

Malaysia can be so beautiful. Malaysia is beautiful. Why do I ever want to leave?

Well, actually, yeah. Because I'm seeking greener pastures.

For the first time in years I went to see my paternal grandma. She's in Selayang Hospital. Diabetic. On the verge of losing her right feet. She's so much smaller now. Slightly deaf.

How did a person grow so old in so little a time? I guess it was good that I went to see her. She won't be around forever, and whatever happened, happened. Time heal a lot of wounds and hurt...
Doesn't mean I'm ready to buddy up the family (not sure will ever be ready either) but at least, I don't want to lose it altogether, y'know what I mean?

Working life is okay now. Getting better and better. Getting used to it. I can and do see myself in this line for at least the next 3-5 years. Not sure what's for me beyond, but yeah. I think I can do this. If there's anything good about being in The Star, it's that the working environment is excellent. The offices, the car park, the pantry, the coffeeshops in vicinity I don't have complaints. There's 6 lifts. And everyone smiles at everyone wearing the same The Star lanyards and staff card. There's a "We-are-family"-like atmosphere, from the janitors to the cafeteria staff to the admin to editors.

Okay. ARA on TV! Ta!

car crash

18 Jan 2007
Time: 01:17

I'm tired so this is going to be short.

Someone crashed into my car yesterday morning.

About 50 metres away from Phileo Damansara entrance.

At 9am. And I was thinking earlier on the way to work about me being accident-free for a while now finally.

When traffic was so congested, no one should be allowed to step onto the gas pedal.

This is my car.

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My poor, poor car.

At first I called my uncle and we went to PJ State police station and on the verge of making a report. She and husband called up to ask if we can "settle" it outside. We went to mechanic in Sri Damansara to get an estimation. Over RM1100. No way they're gonna pay us that much cash.

Then we met at TTDI and husband wants us to see his mechanic - turns out to be a spare parts wholeseller in Segambut. He took us the long, long way through Jalan Duta.

The costs of parts plus repairs almost 600 bucks. Husband broke down and admit they're willing to pay up to RM350 only.

Hello, Jose.

Take a closer look:

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RM350? Impossible, can?

The rear light and signal light alone will cost nearly 300 bucks to fix! I can't even lift my car boot. And my bumper is cracked.

So, after all those tiring runs, back to square one. Police report, it is. Waited well over an hour (think it was nearly two) and bumped into lady-who-did-not-brake at the station, she went in and reported right before I did. Its disappointing to know I'm sitting outside waiting for that long when the cop handling my case is idling inside, smoking and bragging. When the cop looked at my report, he double-take(d) and then asked did the person who bang my car (hereafter known as "banger") just left. I said, yes, she just did.

He asked me to draw a map of where it happened and how, and then he considered it for a bit, and told me to follow him as he rush out to the parking lot. He stopped her from leaving (it's well over 15 minutes since she left the station) the parking lot, and I wondered why she was still there. He told her to park her car into a lot, and I knew she's done for: maybe she was still stunned, maybe she's not a competent driver, I don't know. But when she tried to park into the lot? Clumsy.

When he sat both of us in front of his desk, he asked if we will try to "settle" it and at this point other cops (who's supposed to be working, remember?) butted in with their jokes and remarks and nosey questions - related and non-related to the crash. I was asked if I'm married, if the guy outside with me is my husband and if I'm a reporter and from which paper.


Then someone said with great humour: Don't cry! Like, ha ha ha ha!

Anyhoo, the cop warned her if she insist on reporting, she'd be getting a summons (or compounded). She agreed. So she admitted to being at fault, meaning I can safely claim her insurance to fix my car.

Not pretty.

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And when I stood to leave the station with my fake cute and shy acting, someone asked "Eh, mau pergi minum teh? (Hey, free to go for a cup of tea?)"



Today I went to mechanics and my insurance company and I am now car-less...til Monday is the optimistic estimation. I switched my off days so that I have today til Friday off. But ...I don't have weekend and off on the 31st anymore. Life looks wonderful no?

But when buying copies of my report at the station today, I talked with a man whose son died in a hit-and-run. For some reason, I felt even worst. My case seem so petty now. He looked sad but calm. May he be able to get through this, wherever he is.

Car crash = no fun.

Jun Hoe made this comment,
Hope your car gets repaired soon. Yeah, car accidents are bad news. And somehow as a new driver I seem to be attracting a lot of these bad news too. Just yesterday I was turning left into a mainroad, and suddenly a motorbike just tried to slipped in through my left. It was really narrow and I couldn't stopped in time as I turned and we collided briefly. He quickly nodded an ok and ran off. Sigh.. only noticed a slight dent in my car later.
My reporting experience in the police station was pretty ok, but yeah it can be pretty annoying. Take care yeah, and to many safe accident-free days ahead.

Sportsnut218 made this comment,
You have to *BUY* a report from the station? With all the technology in the world, the police station doesn't have a photocopy machine? ;) Just asking of course.


13 Jan 2007
Time: 10:22

It's a sad, sad thing when you're so bored, you blog from work.
I don't get it (well, I do). Just cos we're interns we have a grueling 9am-5.30pm workdays that we must comply with no matter how busy/free you are.

I guess it's a perk we get to go home early (almost on the dot) but the coming in early thing...I was just sitting here, asleep because in my HUGE newsdesk office room, there's only 2 of my classmates, and 2 other persons - a journalist, and the Officer-in-Charge (OC) of the day.

It's the 3rd day in a row now we have absolutely nothing to do, no news to follow, whatever. They quit sending us out to press conferences, even. There's cartoons on TV3, but meh, who cares.

Maybe I should check Channel [V] out.

I want to go back to sleep.

Okay, nothing on Channel [V].

It's like whatever we do here, the news we write, all our efforts are such useless things that they're not even considered to be used. Bylines? I'd be happy they even print out a small article of mine.

I guess its a huge dose of humble-dom when you know you're just a small minion, an intern, in an overstaffed newsdesk. I'll ask for a transfer I guess, before I get too attached to ...what, the pantry watercooler?

I don't know la, I just cannot see myself doing this kind of journalism for the next 2? 20? years. I want a more society/human focus thing, like, Discovery or even Travel Channel, Food Network...because the mere thought of chasing after national news...I guess I'm a wimp.

That small voice inside my head alternates between don't like la! Don't want la!

And when I get home, and go online, all my friends sound so happy and God forbid, perky, that I feel like singlehandedly make them as miserable as I am. Misery loves company, no? Of course I wouldn't but, I'd give a lot to be not tired and feeling dreadful and drained simply from doing nothing.

I missed classes and the academic world, believe it or not. Checked out universities and the Chevening scholarships one day when I had a lot of time (what one day? It was many) and damn I want it. I want it bad. I even checked out the job opportunities available at Discovery. I'm desperate, you can hear it.

Three months of industrial training will pass. But it's time, really really time to rethink about my future. I'm not ruling out print journalism, but I can safely say, its not going to be my priority. But newspaper journalists make more money than magazine journalists (!!!). How now, how now?

And may I say, I have contempt for people who're all self-importance cos they're cool, they're hype or whatever and speak English and play guitars and is popular. I was annoyed to the point of asking, "Hey. I've been standing here for 10 minutes now. Am I invisible?" You know what was his answer?

"OH! I didn't know it was you! New haircut!"

What was that? I was standing diagonally in front of him, talking with his FRIEND, and he looked another direction all the time. Seriously, if you think you're so cool, you can go to hell in my books. Don't give me attitude because I can give you some back. Sonofabitch.

[defensive] If I want to report on fluffy things, does that make me a less worthy journalist? Do I need to do the hardcore, war-zone, fights-at-parliament, disaster-struck news? Even if I know I'm not liking it? Do I even want to report at all? Can I be a photographer instead? [/defensive]

I don't know.

Don't know.

Hand me my gum gum, dumb dumb already.

Jenna made this comment,
hey my lovely... yea, indeed sucks on the first week.. same here with me.. did nothing but cleaning the writer's desk and organising the cupboard... hahaha.. i miss ya all hell lotss la.. come out and have a drink this week... will let ya know of the time and venue.. if possible, we go kl la.. cuz Darlene is there.. so its convenient for her la... but we'll see how la... miss u heaps..~!!

Singapore @ Christmas

2 Jan 2007
***Update: This blog was written on 28th December but photos couldn’t be uploaded online, hence it took this long to post it. Patience needed to read it. Of course, you should also hop over to Gianne's blog to check out her version of the trip, when she blogs about it.***

I’m back. From Singapore (wait, what, wasn’t she there in October?) once again. And uh huh I was there in Oct, and was kind of reluctant to return for Christmas but alas, circumstances would have it that Bangkok plans had to be shelved and replaced with Singapore. And I went with Gianne, who also happened to be one of my oldest friends. Nearly 14 years and still counting, yo.

I’m not sorry though. Stayed 3 nights the last time, and this time, we planned for 4 nights and ended up staying 5 nights.

It. Was. FUN!

Planning wasn’t really in the agenda this time though, I looked through maps and routes the last time, was planning where to go and how and what and...well, couldn’t be damned to this time. I was also thinking, let Gianne do the homework this time, heh.

Part I
For some funny reason, my mom, the savvy, weathered traveler, became suddenly annoyed at the fact that I bought tickets for buses departing from Puduraya rather than Imbi this time. What makes it kind of exasperating though, was that she nitpicked on me the morning as we leave the house. Lucky for me, I see the humour in the situation. Else we’ll be arguing all the way there.

If she’s to be believed at all, Puduraya is a horrific, dangerous place with touts targeting and chasing and shouting as they follow you and pickpockets eye-locking onto your precious money and electronics – well, not that Puduraya is not like that, but it’s just not as scary as she described it.

I guess one thing is the same with traveling everywhere – vigilance. A thing I did not practice much on this trip, I must admit.

We saw the floodings in Johor down south, it look pretty terrible. Water was so close to the highways, anymore higher we will be floating across North-South Highway instead of driving on it. Unluckily we can’t get any photos, the bus was moving too quickly. And by time we reached Larkin, I was near starkin’ mad. My butt’s numb, I was cold and bored and want to reach Singapore as fast as it was possible.

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Bits and pieces of Day 1

We checked into Inn Crowd where I stayed back in October, and went to have our lunch at Tekka Mall. Then we went to meet Shirley at City Mall MRT station where we did the obligatory tour – Esplanade, Merlion, Fullerton Hotel, Cavenagh Bridge, Stanford Raffles’ statues, Supreme Court buildings and Boat Quay and Clarke Quay. This time, we even threw in Chijmes (try pronouncing THAT! Hahah it’s actually “Chimes”). By the time we got back my legs are aching. Sometimes I wonder is it because we walked too much there...or too little here in KL.

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Gianne’s aunt invited her to Christmas dinner and my dad asked me to dine with him so we went our separate ways but I was seriously tired so after the Korean dinner (which was by the way, really good, and only S$25, without conversion you probably pay about RM50-60 for the same meal we had in Malaysia) and since Gianne wasn’t back yet, was ready to call it a night at 11pm. I actually fall asleep before midnight! But these 2 Indonesian girls were packing and made hella noise so I was awaken and when Gianne came back, we headed to the main building and surfed there a little, and just hang out.

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The hostel.

Around 4.30am when everyone’s asleep, few people came in noisily and this girl across from me on the top bunk started throwing up on her own bed.

Pui Yee’s mind: Hope that not what I think it is


Pui Yee’s very awake mind: Yikes

*sniff sniff*

Pui Yee’s confuzzled mind: But, but, doesn’t smell!

She went on and on and on and then stopped and someone climbed off his bed to check on her with a flashlight.

“She’s breathing?”

“Yeah, yes she is”

He then ducked down to the guy sleeping at the bottom bunk, who’s still snoring.

“Buddy, are you wet?”

“Huh? Huh no”

Not many people were pretending to be asleep at this point.

Peace for a moment -- then... *drip drip drip*

Liquid started dripping from the top bunk. Bottom bunk guy tugged his mattress out of the way, looked for a new bed and settled at an empty one end of the room.

Peace reigns.

I went to the loo, and heard someone hovering at the door and when I opened it some guy barged in, unzipped and peed. And I barely made it out in time. He left the door open.

When I settled back into bed, guy-who-peed came in.

“That’s my bed! Why are you in my bed?”

Bottom-bunk guy is now bunkless.

Next morning, girl-who-threw-up-in-her-own-bed-and-then-slept-in-it moved out (to the main building and avoided all of us) and we saw the staff scrubbing the mattress down and the stains looked like a murder happened on it.

Her puke doesn’t smell! That remained the topic of talk for the next couple of days.

Part II
Next morning we followed a tour to a Chinese temple in Toa Payoh, which is informative about overseas Chinese and their social, economic and educational evolution in South East Asia and Singapore. We were guided by a volunteer anthropologist.

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Temple in Toa Payoh

After the temple, we walked around Toa Payoh residential area trying to get to the bus stop and snapped pics of the flats. And schools.

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Fancy living in pigeon holes?

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Singapore surburbs are organized, clean, compartmentalized and in some ways, lacking in character. It’s all flats and playgrounds and schools. It’s boring. It’s mundane. Vanilla.

Ah, but vanilla is a good flavour, you say? Well, I don’t eat vanilla ice cream unless they come on top of hot waffles or warm choc brownies.

We went to Bugis and was greeted by a HUGE crowd at Bugis Junction. Went to a flea market and then to Arab Street where Gianne wanted to look for cloth.

It was here, in front of Golden Landmark Hotel, she needed to use the toilet. Bad. Took her a while to came out.

We proceeded onto Arab Street and without even looking at the fabric, bent down and told me she needed to use the toilet again. Uh oh.

In front of the same hotel (5 minutes along the street away) she threw me her bag and dashed in. I was getting concerned, however, fabric hunt continued and by chance we walked into a shop where she bought 2 swatches of cloth. Cool. Trip wasn’t wasted.

Back to hostel, had a shower and she skipped dinner.

Oh and I tried to help an Italian guy book a ticket Batam-Jakarta-Bali because the Indonesian agent on the phone can’t speak English and evidently the Italian can’t speak Indonesian. Grief to the staff, they told us to call back. He said he been tryin’ since 4pm and he quit trying at 9pm when their offices close. Without luck.

I pitied him; it was a fuckin’ struggle trying to purchase a ticket from people who aren’t keen on selling you their services.

Gianne and I went to Clarke Quay for a walk and found a bar named morbidly Clinic. Their staff wear scrubs or black shirts with skeletons printed on it. Chairs were shaped like hospital beds and tables like tablets. And they had hospital curtain divider and a post-mortem room as the reception. It. Was. REALLY. Cool.

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When we went back, we chatted with an Indonesian Chinese named Freddy. At 1am we got kicked off and headed to the other building when we said g’night to the people outside smoking and drinking, and stayed back a while to talk with them.

There were 2 guys and a girl and a drinking place. Turned out they were the people coming in late the last night. The girl said “That wasn’t me!” quickly and we all laughed. They’re South Africans and we were wondering if they’re going to BaaBaaBlackChic for the Christmas Eve party but they heard bad things about the food and asked us if we would join them elsewhere instead.

Part III
Gianne and me followed the 3 South Africans – Kira, Gregg and Keith (who’re brothers) – to the Chinese Gardens in Jurong. The garden was huge but not impressive, well, I seen a lot better in China back in May. After spending an entire morning looking at bonsais, we went to Vivo City near Harbourfront for lunch and some shopping.

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Kira, GN, PY, Keith

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Kira, Gregg, GN, PY

Vivo City is HUGE. It was Christmas Eve. The crowds was *checks for superlative* immense/massive/gargantuan/epic/colossal/astronomical. It was like Midvalley and KLCC has been merged there, in the tip of that small island of Singapore, along with its Raya weekend crowds.

There was barely standing space, the foodcourt’s filled to the brim (we can’t even find a single, unoccupied chair) and we had to dodge/avoid/skip/hop around people, strollers, objects and shops. One usual thing though, high-end shops remain quiet. Tells you something about our fellow Singaporeans eh?

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The very packed, very full, very noisy, very old-style, Monsters Inc inspired and Chinese influenced food court.

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Vivo City – half of Singapore must’ve transported themselves here. Ugh.

Then we went to Funan Mall, went back to hostel, had a beer and a shooter of good stuff called Jagermeifter and then dinner.

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The criminally good Jagermeifter (yea-ger-mice-ter) *May be wrongly pronounced as well, though)

We sat outside there and talked and be merry til they kicked us out at 1am (we got kicked out a lot for some reason).

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The party headed to BaaBaaBlackChic where we took photos, joked, had drinking games and talked some more. It was fun. I talked to Chris, a Canadian, and this German dude, Steffen, was just goofing off.

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Tryin’ to be supermodels

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Steffen (drunk) and Gil (not-so-drunk)

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Drunk. Drunk and not-so-drunk.

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Nice er...thing. He wish it’s THAT big.

We said our farewells to our South African friends... they were headed off to Sydney for the next 3 weeks. But not before Keith does a cartwheel while holding his beer bottle without spilling a drop.

Part IV
The next day, we went to get our bus tickets (we extended another night) Gianne went to IMM Mall to get stuff for her cousins and I hung around the hostel just reading and trying not to fall asleep. Wow to Christmas. How exciting. That evening we went to Night Safari where I am absolutely determined not to miss the Creatures of the Night show and I didn’t – except they canceled it midway because it started to rain.

Monsoon sucks! Rain sucks!

Then, Gianne and I were just sitting by the bean bags being bored and I don’t know how, but we (me, Gianne, Chris and Steffen) ended up sitting and talking and then played cards.

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Chris taught us the game which is almost like Chor Dai Dee except it’s a LOT simpler and the game don’t end with one winner, rather they played til all the positions are determined – President, Vice President, Secretary and Asshole. The asshole have to shuffle and sweep the cards away and swap two of his (his because Chris remains the asshole most of the night and he taught us the game) best cards with the president and the president will give two of his worst to the asshole.

Same thing to the vice president and secretary, except its only one card each way.

Part V
Our last day in Singapore was spent going to Suntec City (in vain hopes to eat cheap Japanese buffet and to look at the Fountain of Wealth but no luck, rain) and then shopped a little. We then walk to Marina Square and looked at the Christmas decors and window shopped. I bought a battery-less flashlight! Then using CityLink Mall (underground, fully-air conditioned shopping, shopping and shopping), we walked back to City Hall MRT and back to hostel.

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Okay, I flattered myself by wearing a UK 18 sized shirt and GN’s glasses, trying to look like Lydia Sum and partly succeeding.

After packing our stuff, taking a shower and chatting a little with a new arrival from Indonesia about the Chinese there, we went back to meet Steffen and then talked about where to go for dinner.

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Very funny sign I took while idling

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This cat meant business. He bites!

“No foodcourts! No Chinese food! Something western!”

That came from Steffen.

Well, it’s my last night, and I’m ready to spend.

We argued the merits of Harbourfront and Clarke Quay and then the 4 of us headed to Clarke Quay (to my insistence).

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Clarke Quay at night.

And, you know what, it was the opening of some Mardi Gras festival and all the bars and restaurants set up booths and the food was free. Not only was it free, it was GOOD. And there were plentiful. Free-flowing alcohol!

Singapore Sling!




Hooters chicken wings! Satay! Tapas! Chillies! Ribs! Steak, kidney and potatoes stew!

Live music!

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Ehem, note the blissful (and greedy) faces.
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It was a happy, good night. We laughed and joked as we walked the narrow way across from Clarke Quay to MRT and we laughed as Chris told Steffen to stick to his side when Steffen got a little hyper and started dancing and trying to jump onto things and it was a steep stairway down to the water without barriers – one wrong move and doink, doink, doink, plop (in Chris’ words).

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If Steffen says he’s not drunk, I guess he’s not drunk, then.

The margarita we had hit me when we are at the hostel, I fall asleep at the table with 7, 8 people chatting away. It was like mini-UN meeting.

Part VI
We went back the next day after breakfast. I was getting real tired of the 2 eggs and 2 toast routine, I’m swearing I’m off fried eggs for a couple weeks now. Consumed enough protein and cholesterol to last me ages.

But, you know what, I MADE scrambled eggs! Look!

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That evening I went out to dinner with my besties and some friends from secondary school. While we all take advantage of the endless pasta day, 3 girls had only what, juice and soup? This is a choice of being fat and happy, or hungry and beautiful.

Tough. I love my food.

But but but...I want to be thin too :(

I watched as they asked for permission from their respective boyfriends to follow us to another bar for drinks and was thinking (kind of in contempt, I must admit) that my boyfriend (that sad, unlucky potential guy) will have no say about me staying out late with my girlfriends drinking and gossiping away.

I mean, I told my dad over dinner in Singapore I’ll join in the parties and he told me not to become too drunk but then contradicted himself when I said spirits are only S$3 and beer S$7 for two.

“That’s cheap! Then buy more! Alcohol here is expensive!”

You get what I mean? My parents don’t give me shit about drinking, so why should a half-baked boyfriend do that? Why would they need a boyfriend telling them when to sleep, what to wear and how to behave? My parents sure don’t do that to me.

And those girls sleep by midnight. They barely eat. They’re obsessed with how they look like. Comments on food and fat all the time.

We are different. I guess I realize I’m happier being who I am than being in their shoes. I’ve got all the liberties I want (within boundaries set by my mom) and in many ways, those rules are very reasonable. I am keeping my own passport now, for instance. Just that, I stay at home, and well, rules are rules.

I am grateful. And I should learn not to be so harsh and mean to myself anymore. I’m hurting myself the most, not people around me.

But it also means we’re off-putting to the general Malaysian male. According to a guy who is the boyfriend of a close friend, he said Malaysian guys are either possessive or egoistic. They want a passive, docile girlfriend. And we’re fiery hotpots. We scare them. We intimidate them. We’re too much trouble, too much work, too high maintenance.

I guess sometimes, they’re right when they say we’re the choosy ones.

With the travelers I feel comfortable. This was the better trip by far, we made friends and exchanged contacts and shared many laughter and jokes. I don’t have to worry about how I look like or that the first thing they’re thinking is “fat girl”. It’s a huge release.

The earthquake in Taiwan downed some fiber optic lines so this blog will probably be published at a much later date (it’s Dec 28, 9pm right now) along with the uploaded photos. I promised to send photos to people but I guess that’ll take some time too.

Owh well. Like Steffen (he lost his luggage at the airport) said – you can’t control a situation so make the most out of it.

I will always remember traveling is about the people you meet along the way. And I’m loving living it. It’s great.

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I’ve been bitten by the traveling bug. Oh, and, there’s an Austrian guy who traveled through Australia and Bali who was bitten by bed bugs. I shit you not. His hands were all red and angry and itchy and he saw the doctor and had a flea bath and disinfected all his things and washed every single clothing he owned (including his backpack).

“I’m hating myself right now. It’s disgusting. I can see little bugs falling out of my hair when I took a shower”

Lucky for him he was getting okay as the days pass by. It looked so terrible at the beginning.


Anyway, Singapore, over and out.

Next: Industrial Training in The Star on Jan 3.


Sportsnut218 made this comment, ;) of course it took me a week to get around to reading it .. oops

Year that was 2006

1 Jan 2007
Time: 04:36

Well here is the obligatory year-end blog. The blog that summarizes the entire 2006.

Its been a long, colourful year, I guess. I never went to so many places like I did this year (though Amelia must’ve outdone me by far by going to Penang, what was it, 3 times?) and I sure learnt a bit more, become a lil bit wiser, and still the same bitchiness and bitterness.

In 2006 I did not fall in love. That is a sad confession isn’t it? It’s so difficult to find guys you’d even consider suitable and worthy as a partner. Many people are shocked at the number of singles (who’re attractive, intelligent and actually owns a personality) in this part of the world. What’s wrong with your men, they ask. Hoo boy, wish I know.

Looks like I’m not the only girl hard hit by the seemingly lack of suitable suitors though (excuse the pun). Recently, news splashed across our headlines (and Singapore’s) of our men “buying” and marrying Vietnamese girls instead of locals.

Local girls are too educated, too fiery and too opinionated.

Oh yeah?

So my question is, how come the gentlemen hasn’t caught up? It IS 2006 AD and while my sisters are moving ahead with rapid speed, it seems the brethren have fallen behind. Is it now our fault that we’re too far ahead of far too many men? Are they intimidated? Turned off? Scared? Shy? Or are they still holding out for girls they can control, girls who are docile, passive and obedient?

Well, in that case, good luck buying a marriage. I’ll say with confidence and a bit of sarcasm that sorry, my sisters and I won’t bat an eyelid at you either.

Perhaps you gotta evolve and move along with us girls, afterall, men has ruled the earth for millenniums and the earth’s still a pretty fucked up place. Who knows with a switch, good may come out of it? Who knows anything about anything, right? (This quote did not come from me, it came from a guy!)

In 2006, friendships grew stronger, friendships faded off. I did get a glimpse of what is it like...flitting, brief, but it’s enough for me to take a step back and reevaluate. I’m happy with my status now. Don’t need to change a thing.

In 2006, I flew to Penang with my girlfriends, went to Yunnan in China alone, sort of backpacked to Singapore in October and traveled there again with Gianne for Christmas.

Now I am determined more than ever to find a way to earn enough money to backpack – we’re going to do the SE Asia circuit first (Thailand, Vietnam, Cambodia, Myanmar, hopefully, even Bali) then, we’ll see. Who knows? Europe will be so amazing. And then there’s USA. And South America.

In 2006, I’m still stuck in a rut, perhaps worst than ever, by being addicted to online chatting and not going out and meeting more people. But where should we go? How do we meet people? Our social circles’ this small and it’s not pancakes to widen it. It gets bland and stale, because no matter where you go, or what you do, you meet the same people, or at least, same type of people, over and over, til you get so fed up, you’d say, screw it.

I sure have faith that there are people on the same wavelength as my friends and I, just the question, where? It’s not that I am saying we’re as proud, delusional and egocentric as to be rigid and unchanged and not make friends with different types of people. Strictly speaking for myself, it takes me a while to accept difference, though I have learnt to respect difference more than ever. I guess I’m just really stupid this way. And stubborn.

And, have you ever had the feeling of knowing you want to go somewhere, you know how to get there, but then, its not a clear cut method, and somewhere along the way, you lose sight of your goal, and the way to go there?

That feeling hopelessness engulfs you and makes you feel useless and paralysed and want to give in to the ebbs and flow of life and you feel like you’re contented to just plod along. And in no time, discover you’re dragging your feet, with a long face and a defeated sigh.

I’ve got goals. I know how to get there. But the getting there, the battling the demons in my head, scars from the past and fear of the unknown, voices from within as well as from people without (and a considerable amount of laziness) are all holding me back.

When faced with actual choices and decisions you have to make...Change is a terrifying thing.

But I am welcoming 2007 and all it will bring with open arms. Its been good, but I know it could’ve been better, it will be better. I deserve to be nicer to myself, and God knows, everyone around me deserve more niceness from me.

This internet slow-down is a bit of a pain, but now I know how much we took internet speed, the connectivity and those fragile fibre optic cables for granted. I can’t upload pictures or email my newfound friends and I’m not even sure I can post this blog on time. Though I agree the news articles in Star about bloggers whining about not being able to blog and vent about their emotions and feelings pathetic. Do something productive for once, I guess, instead of sitting there shivering because you can’t get your daily 8-hour of online gaming.

People lost homes, people died from that earthquake (er, right?), and down south in Johor, there are people made homeless by floods. Saddam Hussein got executed, people got murdered, women got raped and children starve in the streets. And you’re whining about not having the Internet for a few days and because of that you can’t blog or game?

Come on. What are we, shallower than the flatlands of Holland?

Cheers 2006.


18 Dec 2006
Time: 02:02

This entry is just to inform you I won't be blogging anymore that I'm still alive and kicking.

Semester break has begun and exams' over. I was late 30 minutes for my Moral paper which has never happened to me at all in my life (being late for exam, that is).

Feature writing tutorials rawk. I got sent to The Star for industrial training and currently awaiting my non-arriving offer letter.

Meanwhile I'm at home on my non-addictive chat client being bored and pissed with everyone. Oh. I cut my hair last week and went Xmas shopping with Amelia and Shwu Chenn in Midvalley. I'll require work clothes too. I'm broke. Can you donate money? I want money.

Going to Singapore on the 22nd til 26th, bought bus ticket, this time from Puduraya, and watched The Red Kebaya.

I'll nitpick three things:
The Red Kebaya is the title of the movie. Yet they did not develop the storyline based on it. It's not even symbolic enough to be titled as such.

If in the end the 2 men say they're happy to meet an old friend, then that friendship is horrendously underdeveloped. Nobody know where the Chinese boy came from, where he lived, whose child he is.

Dialogue was rehearsed and cliched - especially the cameraman's secretary. Its fine for a book, but not for a movie. And the two murderers who became druggies? CHEESY.

But all in all?
Support our local movie industry :)

Watched Eragon too. If you can mislook the LOTR-feelalike parts, I actually have not much complaints...because I never read the novel nor had any expectations.

And fook, Eragon has abs.

Oh yeah, be forewarned, Emo-PY is on the loose again. Will try Self-restraint, but do bear with me.

Sportsnut218 made this comment,
You really should blog more often ;) They're fun to read your thoughts on stuff.

celebrity lookalike

20 Nov 2006
Time: 21:27

my friends

19 Nov 2006
Time: 15:36

We went yamcha last night and chatted and talked til almost 2am.

We talked shop. Gossiped. Politicked. And camwhored.

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I scared myself driving home at 2am. My car only on the streets. Big, dark, menacing trees moving in the wind. Shadows dancing at the backseat.

I looked at the rearview mirror and jumped a few times. Gawd, I'm a scaredy-cat.

But. Girls. Me heart y'both.

Missed yah. Mwahs.

GenieOnTheLoose made this comment,
wah nice arrangement of the photos!

Ryan Star @ Zouk

17 Nov 2006
Time: 14:38

I drive to the city about 4.15pm to avoid the jam and what do you know? The congestion already started outside Jalan Ampang. Parked at Zouk (RM10 per entry @#$@#$@@@!!!) and walked over to KLCC, snapping a lot of pics of the beautiful buildings...which I will not put up.

It's a beautiful day I'd say, the weather co-operated. The rain came nearer to 7pm, which in these days is a blessing. If it rains all afternoon...horror.

Anyway, I met Suanie for the first time and it's her I'm thanking for for the 4 invites.

Thank you, Suan.

Like the camwhores we are, we snapped a lot of pics of ourselves..and of the VJs. And oh, oh, Ryan Star. No offense la, I know the man only 2 days ago.

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By the way, I get to hug VJ Dom =). Don't be jealous, yo.

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Our moments :)

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The man of the night. Dude's pretty bad tempered, heh. He actually made "suck" jokes and said the f-word and threw his guitar and mic. VJ Dom was like..."owh man...this is a pretty guitar...he threw the guitar..."

As for reviews....go see the papers. OR something. I recorded some of his songs too, whee. I liked 1959 and Ordinary, though.


Dafne Miranda made this comment,
Hey. I was the girl that went up on stage. i heard him say something about sucking.. and then i sorta blanked... what did he say? :S

Pui Yee made this comment,
uhm he said something awful actually, like, u sure u got it? don't suck it for me...i mean, suck jokes...u know...blow job?


15 Nov 2006
Time: 01:16

...I'm gonna have to say, the highs of life are really high, and the lows are low.

I've been low, LOW since the weekend...I'm not going to talk about it either. Actually I think I finally qualify for the "seek help" category know, depression and all that...I haven't broken down this badly for a while now...oh...Prozac already!

As they say...same shit, different days.

And well, I know, I know, you all been telling me, talk to someone who can help, talk it out...and I'm not doing that anymore. If you guys are not tired of me imposing all my shit on you, I'm tired of imposing my shit onto everyone.

Okay, happy-happy things now!

If you guys been reading Star's entertainment section on Monday, there's an article about the Mersey Beatles (I remember it well cos of Amelia's former haircut heh) and guess what? The chatroom I'm addicted to where I chat nightly?

[star struck]One of the band guys was talking to me there![/star struck] He said KL was nice and Hard Rock was nice and one of our ministers sang too (Lim Keng Yaik, yikes), bla bla. And it IS him cos *waggles finger* he was on webcam.


Ryan Star of Rockstar:Supernova will be performing in Zouk on Thursday and guess who got 4 free passes?


Just listen to his rendition of Iris. Worth the high, oh my God.

I. Am. Happy.

Really. Reality may suck, but, had I really did the thing I wanted to do 2 days ago...well. Gotta keep on telling myself..there is hope, there is a way out, there is something to live for, there is a future.

That the ebb and flow of life will never leave me alone. That I have a right to feel angry, sad and depressed, too. That I'm not defected. That I can pull myself out of it. That I'm not perfect. That I am worthy, too.

That I deserve to love, and be loved.

That I will find love, the elusive shadow.