Friday, March 23, 2007

new wardrobe and singapore

26 Sep 2006
Time: 15:46

A few guilt trips and indulgences, swearing, shouting, yelling, crying and rudeness later...

New 'puter equipment and wardrobe and bookshelf from Ikea.

Dad was in town for 4 days. Each day an excruciating reminder why my parents are a terrible match, even without an external force. And why, in spite of mom and me at odds a lot of times, it's actually been relatively peaceful in my household.

Also, that, well, I am a terrible person. I am. I know how ugly I am inside, how I can treat the ones I allegedly loved most.

Long story, and not very interesting to tell.

I'll take some pictures tomorrow - they came and install the wardrobe but the sliding door is chipped, will replace it tomorrow morning.

Last night I dreamt. A friend (A) I only see once or twice a year died and no one told me. When I found out I was sobbing and disbelieving, even called A's handphone and it was cut off; already discontinued. In my dream A's parents bar us from seeing A. And I felt remorse for not calling A or seeing A more often.

I text messaged A when I remembered this afternoon. A's ok. Everything's ok. Nightmares suck.

Meanwhile. Well, there's nothing to doing something other than to just do it.

I told my parents over a couple of meals I intend to travel to Singapore budget style, asked around a bit and got some cheap rates.

And I went ahead and bought a bus ticket and paid deposit for a dorm room online. Looks ok. I'm staying here. It's S$18 per night, and they have directions to almost every local tourist spot in Singapore, free ones at least, on their website too. Right down to MRT lines and directions.

And I'm meeting a couple of friends over a couple of days. But the rest of the time, I'm on my own. Crossing my fingers to meet people there too who'll let me join them to walk around. Going places alone is a bit ... who to take picture for me with?!

Am not lying -- I was all gungho and "no worries! I can ask around! I can get a map! I know how to take an MRT and ride a bus!" with my dad, couldn't take a no for an answer but now, I'm getting a little bit of a cold feet, and extremely nervous. Alone and in a new city? (Okay not so new, I was last there more than 10 years ago) Staying in a dorm a.k.a. no privacy and ALL strangers?

*Butterflies attempting to climb out of throat and fly around my head prettily*

Just do it.

Start somewhere.

Or else, mimpi kosong wanna backpack through Europe la! All talk no action, right.

Okay. It's only Singapore.

Sportsnut218 made this comment,
have a funnnnn trip :) no more butterflies.. as Nike slogan says 'Just Do It!'

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