Friday, March 23, 2007


17 Aug 2006
Time: 23:20

I feel loved. :)

Thank you. For everything. From everyone who's there for me.

And, I'm ok. Will always be. You know I bounce back. And you know a couple months from now there'll be another sob entry.

Life is as such.

Okay. This, backpacking thing.

For years I have wanted to do it. Thought about it. Fantasized. But I've never taken any action or seriously sit down to plan it.

What we did in Penang in May, I really enjoyed it, although we weren't roughing it out, strictly speaking. I loved the loose itinerary and bus hopping (the only cab we took was to and fro airport) and air travel and bus travel. But it was only 3 days. I'm talking at least couple of months here.

I talked with LC and GN the other day. Europe? Or start out with just Italy? If we do only one country it'll be much, much cheaper. Then again, Europe is not cheap at all. I surfed around some backpacking sites (mostly from and for Americans) and they recommend at least USD6000 for 3 months of traveling. That's RM24 000+. I can buy a (second hand) Kancil with it. I guess in a way it's sort of really wasteful to throw money away for a couple months of leisure. But, okay, let's go on with the plan.

If I travel in USA (UK is out because pound sterling is fricking you-know-what and well, I HAVE been there) it'd be easy option because heck, English and food won't be a problem. But, hmm. I suppose its not really location, stuff to bring, passports or whatever.

And as a last resort I can even look for a travel companion (on trusted) backpacking forums and sites. I can rough it out, walk for miles (so long you don't make me jog!) provided I start conditioning before departure.

And dad, very strangely, called me up from Singapore all excited because a new temp staff in his office came back fresh from 6(?) months in USA. He's 18 or something and was with a programme that allowed him to work in a resort/hotel/restaurant earning travel money and then 42 days of travel. My first thought was, oh, man, I'm going to be a university graduate working as a chambermaid in a resort for old people in USA? But, uhm, hey. Dad endorsed it. I should pick it up. Then there's AIESEC if I care to be active in it.

Its really about the money. Some sites recommend "Start *insertnamehere-insertdestinationhere* Fund" and beg for items like backpacks/travelling gear from friends and relatives. I guess that's ok for smaller sums but I'd have to earn the money. If I've learnt anything, it's the Chinese saying - Rather than beg other people, better depend on oneself. And taking pleasure on someone else's account is just not really right (okay fine, so I do that most of the time). If I start out working I guess I can earn and save enough for traveling in 3 years.

Then I'll wonder if I should spend it on my Masters or backpacking. Oh, man. Its really prudence vs. rashness here.

The bottomline is, I should start saving. I've been spending so much money I did not earn, well, erm, I start to feel bad? If you peek into my RHB account since quitting Swatch you'd gag. I dare not even think about it. I should cut up my ATM cards to stop myself from withdrawing all the time.

And, hmm. I should probably start working again. Maybe I'll look for a job again in September during semester break. Hmm. Where can I find a job that uses my skills AND don't pay nuts? Damn. Actually I like it in retail line. Meeting people and working with products I love. Just that, you know, they pay nuts.

Hmm. I should start digging for info about backpacking call my manager up soon.

Finals in less than a month. Getting jittery. Its my least favourite semester thus far. To be honest I only enjoyed Communication Theories (don't think I'm weird! I just like theories and applications and philosophy and principles!) and Journalism II this semester.

And yesterday I lost my temper and control over my tongue and was sarcastic to our beloved inept tutor which prompted him to put the blame back on us. I mean, what happened was, he was late 15 minutes. Lateness is a normal occurence for him. If he's late in the morning its because of traffic congestion. What happened to leaving home 15 minutes earlier? Everyone knows there will be traffic jams everywhere at 7-9am! I was already pissed about something and I was the 2nd person entering the class and I just-couldn't-resist saying ever so softly "Wow sir, you're early".

His outburst was sad, hilarious though. He said something like "Its because of you students! Showing me sketches, last minute work, my consultation hours bla bla bla I wouldn't be late other wise, bla bla bla"

I was thinking, right, our fault again, when he shoved his chair and yelled "I AM NOT YOUR SLAVE!"

Reason told me not to answer his call and start yelling back at him. He's paid to come to class ON TIME. He's paid to teach us, not continue with his "consultation" with students from another class. His duty was to make sure we understood the basics of QuarkExpress, Photoshop, Illustrator and Dreamweaver in 14 weeks.

Logic told me this ambitious, screwed up megalomaniacal tutor failed in his duty.

So I should not be calling names. But hey, this guy thinks we students treat him like a slave for not coming to class in time! Seriously? I mean, seriously! A slave! And someone said he sent an SMS to him asking when they can get their layout pads and he answered "I'm not your slave. Where's your *please*?" Seriously? Seriously!

What. Is. Wrong. With. HIM!

I am pretty angry with him. With this shit. With him not teaching us anything yet expect us to do impossible tasks on the software. With him being so ill-equiping us. With him not considering the fact that none of us are graphic students. We're journalism and PR students. It's not fair to deal with us so high-handedly and expect us to take it. With what a manipulative person he is. He's so clever and cunning and sly with putting blame on others within 2 seconds of confrontations, so good at protecting himself, people like us, with fiery, hot temper loses out.

So I need anger management class. Learn to be cold, calculated and rational. To deal with people like him.

Hooboy I'm scaring myself. Pee in my pants.

melia made this comment,
yeahhh the US programme...i got it in my uni letterbox. sounds good to me and I am actually contemplating on it. but i dont want to be travelling alone la. that's one thing. am not an independent traveller. I like someone to share the view or 'whatchamacallit's with. XD
Backpacking is definitely in my 'things to do before i die' list. That, kickboxing, bellying dancing and skiing. I'm chickening out on bunjee jumping because i has this nightmare where I broke my neck at the jerk. X(

Penang rocked yo! Love da beach. Wahhhhhh! *drools*


Heh. Kidding yo.

Aidid Razak made this comment,
Are you in AIESEC? Cause I am and I am so AIESEC-y you won't believe. You should know that it's a cult yeah? But it's a cool cult that creates positive change so I'm happy :)

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