Getting a life

7 Dec 2003
At the moment
Song: Memory - From the musical Cats
Mood: Whacked
What I had last: Ice cream
My brain is saying: Starting to get boring, no?
Time: 23:45
Wishlist: Olympus M[mju:]400 Digital Camera or Kodak Easy Share. I really really really need this camera..my current one worked like Stone Age and if anyone have RM1k+ to spare...


So. I was watching Miss World 2003 and since last week after watching You Decide, I was vouching for Miss Phillipines. She's just ABSOLUTELY gorgeous. But, well, I didn't expect her to win the crown or anything. Cos...well. Someone else always do. And someone else did.

Anyway, just in case you didn't know, I'll just clue you in:
2nd runner up - Ms China
1st runner up - Ms Canada
Miss World - Ms Ireland

What can I say? Ms Ireland is stunning. Well. So is Ms Australia, so is Ms Trinidad, so is Ms Norway...and Ms....my point is, they're all beautiful, beautiful women. But Ms China getting 2nd runner is so predictable. No offense, but it always happen this way. Whatever event, as long as it's hosted in China, the Chinese rep will ALWAYS, always get a place.

I was thinking, at the final 5, more to Ms India, Ms Phillipines (surprise! She made it to top 5!) and Ms Ireland. Er, but Ms Canada and well, Ms China (expected anyway)...? It's not that they're NOT gorgeous. I mean, who am I, the ugly butthead to comment, but, they're just, well, other even more gorgeous ladies. Sheesh.

And before the protest parties and human rights what-nots and feminists barge in, there's absolutely nothing wrong with participating in Ms World and gawking at 106 beautiful ladies from 106 nations. Naw, not law breaking or an offense or anything. And it's NOT degrading. It's just, well, an event you'll watch, discuss, diss, bet, vouch and be slightly excited about. An annual thing. Incidentally, I don't watch Oscars, MTV Awards, Golden Globe, etc, though. I'm not a movie-music maniac. Or even fan. Which stood for fanatic.

Fanatic.
I know there's nothing wrong being obsessed with someone. But to the point of fanatism...it takes money, energy, dedication and ...and... I don't know, to me, only idle people go absolutely ga-ga over a matter that won't affect someone's living or death. Yeah, I was sad Princess Diana died. But I didn't bother with her millions of stories, tributes, get-fast diaries by her butlers and toilet janitors. Prince William is goodlooking, hey, but all I know about him is that he's in St. Andrew's University (right?). Linkin Park is made of, er, how many guys? I only know their frontman is Chester what's-his-last-name and Mike Shinoda. Good music, though. Lord of the Rings is whoa, whoa. Legolas is even more whoa, whoa. Yeah, I know. His real name is Orlando Bloom and he was also in Black Hawk Down. But I don't even know who's who in BHD. Too much action and gory. And Aragorn is Viggo something. I know cos I came across his article in this month's CLEO magazine. Harry Potter! Now, that's a series I'm in love with. And I know every detail of everything in the books. I hate the movies, and if I can, I want to tell Mr. Chris Columbus (nicely, of course) he deserve to be jinxed on because he chopped, diced and stewed everybody's imagination, including author J.K. Rowling with his sub-standard movies. But those supplementary not-authorized-by-author opinion books and smart aleck get-rich-fast comments? Didn't even slipped through much of it in bookstores. As a lil girl, I was fascinated with Devon Sawa, Backstreet Boys and River Pheonix. I used to know small details about them, but I never persued them after I past the age of 14. Heck, I remember back then there was this great website called Young Male Stars and you can peruse biodatas, filmography and photos of most YMS. But after it got plucked from WWW, I lost interest. But, man, Backstreet Boys, you guys were damned good. I won't mind waiting for another month, another year, decade, whatever, for your next single.
And ahem, VJ Utt, hi if you read this :). You're way way cute. VJ-ing skills need brushing up, though.

You get my point? I have my life. I have a life. My life is full of everyday drama (and it's more realistic than those Wakefield twins from Sweet Valley). I don't need boys or worshipping stars to get through day after day. Yah. I'm a serious person who love wisecracks, wisdom, puns and sarcasm. But you talk about Hollywood, I get glazed over. I watch tv, don't get me wrong! Third Watch, Alias, CSI:Miami, Reality tv, Roswell, Dark Angel -- they all rock my boat. But uh, I don't surf into their official/unofficial/fanatic/whatever website. I especially will NOT even bother with those...those...fanfic stuff. Those are amazingly *raise eyebrow* ....and I mean, hell, GET A LIFE, people! You guys are imaginative but...er...don't waste your resources on fantasizing about people you'll not get personal with.

And if I actually offend anyone, get a life :). It's a free world. I can say whatever I want, hate and love whoever I want. Got a problem with that? Get a life.

So. What sort of life did I get this past 2 weeks post-SPM? Well, it was absolutely exciting. Thus far, I've FINALLY did an inventory of my piles of school books (inculding Form 4 and Form 5 text, reference, workbooks and tuition notes). And I've cleared most of them and handed it to the newspaper collector. If anyone of you want to purchase 2nd-hand pure science stream text/reference books, please gimme a uh-oh at ICQ 92124903 a.s.a.p. cos I'll sell them to 2nd-hand vendors in Amcorp Mall after I came back from Sipadan Mabul. Price: Half-prices and a lil higher for mint-conditioned books. Negotiatable. I also sort of cleared my 'puter table. It was full of printed emails, song lyrics, notes, books and glue, scissors, plugs and coasters. Ah, the highlight of it all was cleaning up my toilet/bathroom. It wasn't in a disgusting state, but it was, well, how a toilet is. Caps of Dettol and detergents later, phew, it's sparkly. And, and finally I actually cleaned my room, rid of old posters, junk, old makeup, clothes and wiped all the dust and dirt from everywhere: ceilings, fan, AC, blah blah blah. That's how it is, holidays. You do something, anything, to keep your days (and nights) occupied.

Still no job yet. Damn, I'm so embarassed to admit this. I didn't look too hard, but I should be looking nontheless, especially if I plan on May college intake. Must find job, must find job! Volunteering will be a close second; SPCA always welcome volunteers. And Red Cross, Befrienders and the tree-huggers and fish are shark's human's friends org...but no money, all this is pointless. I don't even have money to commute! Job! Money! $$$! *PY cackling like a witch with $$ on her forehead*. See la. Ship reaching bridge will right itself - Chinese saying.

That's the feast for today, I think. I know I missed something I wanted to say originally. Will add it in as soon as I recall. Anyways, adios for a whole week, for I'm flying off to Sabah on Tuesday morning and will stay the night at a bungalow on Monday with other BRATs and don't think I'll kick enough ass to say much tomorrow. I'm such a show off, no? Heh. Ta!

Head: Gee I feel a lil swollen.
Mind: You are! You are! Let me deflat it!
Brain: NooooOOooo!
Mind: Opps. Did I go too far? Looked a bit bird-brained shape from this angle.
Brain: Tweet! Tweetttt! tweetitter tweet tweet.


Additional:
Sigh. If you don't believe life will downspiral in exactly 5 minutes, well, you're looking at it. Glass half empty seemed more logical than glass half full. You don't choose to live, you're forced to. God, I wish...I don't need to continue with life. Just let it end. She don't care. She won't. I don't know. I've run out of reasons. No more excuses. As though I've taken the vow of silence. I don't want to explain. No more. Takes too much energy. No more. They all feel pathetic. Like I've no right for opinion. Like I've no right to be alive. To be someone's daughter. To be living. I'm so full of hatred. So full of disappointment. I'm just somebody's eternal burden. Will I do her a favour if...if I'm not here anymore? I don't know how to carry on. I'm tired of starring in my own drama. I want to take my final bow. No more encores. But I can't. I'm stuck. So stuck. So jaded. And it sucks.

Comments:
A visitor made this comment,
I watched Miss World too. Miss Ireland, she is so sweet and beautiful.
Phyion [phyion8@yahoo.com]

Michelle made this comment,
Hey Puiys.. yup i watched Miss World too..i know, i wanted Miss Phil to get the crown too!! My mum was voting for Miss Ireland the whole time! And my sis and i were insulting her :We said Miss Irel is like a barbie doll-dumb blode. But, yes..she is beautiful. But i think Miss Phil and Miss Indi should win! I think that Miss Indi should be the 1'st runner up or something. Her answer was interesting!! And smart!! But my mum said that she was a 'phony'. But did you realized some of the candidates were..erm..really...er....not pretty?
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