Monday, March 19, 2007

And it continues...

18 May 2004
At the moment
Song: Perfect - Simple Plan
Mood: Deflated
What I had last: Dinner
My brain is saying: *sigh*
Time: 23:26
Wishlist: A hella load of CASH

This is Pui Yee reporting live from the front of her computer, inputing info using keyboard and reading the output on her monitor...sorry. That's what I learnt from one single Computer Systems lecture anyway.

Real classes started this week. My timetable sucks. I got 18 periods and I'm taking 6 subjects this semester...and I have Saturday classes - one hour of BM: Kemahiran Berkomunikasi I (!???).

I kept an open mind about taking English and BM, but to have a single hour every Sat? That sucks. 'Nuff said.

Or is it?

Tonight's the night for me to complain. And I'm complaining. So far, college...well, sucks. I'm over-using that phrase. I better look for an alternative. Seriously, though. Yesterday they inform us there is to be no tutorials this week at all. And that left me with 3 hours to kill in between lectures. I did not have a blast, but at least I'm pretty free to do what I wanted to - stew alone in the park. I got an ex-classmate joining me during his lunch hour. Today, I have a class at 1100, and supposedly another class at 1500 (please note this fact). So I had 3 hours to kill and I joined this 2 Indian girls. Actually there were 6 of us. 2 guys, 4 girls. We had lunch (technically, they had lunch) in Canteen 2 and the original plan is to walk to library to make use of it's air conditioning. And then someone had to make a call. And then we did not go to library. So 2 of girls knew each other. Naturally, the conversation was out for me; I have nothing to say. The wavelength wasn't right. The frequency was waaay off. Soon they were joined by 2 guys, one of the girl's friends. That made me even more the reason to have absolutely nothing to talk about. And then I saw my ex-schoolmates, scooted over as though I was on fire.

Don't get me wrong. My new-found friends are nice, interesting, friendly people and I'm grateful they even let me tag along. But the situation was awkward. *sigh* When they get into religion, I even have less and less things to say...people who knew me well know this is one of my no-no.

See that's the problem. I can't deal with new people. I can't deal with explaining. The way I see it, I have nothing to explain, nothing juicy to impart, but for the sake of socialising, I have to. THAT sucks. I don't know if it was a part of me from way back or it I changed in the last 6 months. I hate being asked questions. And I don't ask much, either. Just anything that struck my fancy, like if the lecturer is weird, or is the hour ungodly. Like, why do I choose journalism? How do I explain that? I don't know. I just did. My ex-schoolmates asked what I'm planning to major in, and when I said journalism, they go "Ohhhh, I knew it". Need no further explanations, y'know? And some personal things ARE personal. People should know better than ask. Right?

Commuting to college is another problem. Waiting for trains, waiting for feeder buses, digging for people do that far years?! I did that for 4 days and I'm sick of it. I thought this afternoon, that's it, I'm driving. But I have no college car sticker. I can't park inside, and outside the parking is infamous for being occupied, right down to the last rat holey for the Kancil. And in the recent times, I've seen 2 accident scenes in the Genting Klang highway itself. And my old man told me long ago that's an accident-prone highway. All factors added up and you get a very cowardly Pui Yee for driving to college.

My God, I hope the people I spent time with today will never (ever) discover my blog least discover it like, next year. I'm looking for other people to go to library with tomorrow if there's more 3-hour breaks. Need to smile more to new classmates. And...uhhh. Hope they're less boisterous. Okay. They better not discover my blog at all.

I can't believe today I waited 3 stupid crummy hours for one stupid class whose lecturer is absent today and the stupid office never inform us and we stupidly waited a further 15 minutes in class and we're the stupidest people ever to have been had today.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

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