At the moment
What I had last: Apple salad
My brain is saying: Finally!
Wishlist: Someone to teach me play guitar.
Finally, I'd say. Have I ever mentioned I hate changes, and the brand new *look* blog-city's offering, actually, sucks? They're currently SLOW, plenty of Error windows appear and they made the navigating boxes sound cool, but in reality, make navigating harder. It's like MSN trying to look smart while getting you to pay for their stupid space.
I haven't been blogging for a while, maybe over a week and has been itching to do so. Unfortunately, as everyone in blog-city will agree, the thing won't even load, and when it did, take ages to load a page. In fact, I gave up today but thought I'd give it another shoot.
Forgive me if I'm not coherent. In fact I'm quite coherAnt. Get it? Rant.
Days pass by slowly, sometimes so fast. Yesterday I can't remember if it's a Saturday or one of those days in the middle of the week.
Last Friday, I visited Tunku Abdul Rahman College (TarC hereafter). Bar any obstacles, it'll be my college for 3 semesters. Yeah I've sent in the application forms. In the greatest irony of all, I selected Bach of Comm (Hons) Journalism as my first choice, and Bach of Sci (Hons) Biotech as my second. I don't think I'll get Biotech, but if...because I love Biology. The only Science I scored an A1 on in SPM - the only one I did not get tuitions on and the only one with concepts I understood and can apply.
The highlight was a tour around the campus...at first I told mom let's just hang back and let the other group follow the guide. Afterall we've been to the tour and it's just a refresher course for us. Mom agreed. I didn't get a good look, but the other group was made up of 8-10 girls, with bleached hair and Mashi Maro shirts with lots of complicated ribbons and cords and platforms. Oh they speak Mandarin.
By the time we reached the 2nd building, the group was lagging. I turned back to see the group immersed in their own conversation. And when they giggle, I shivered and told mom "God. Jakun alert, 6 o'clock." We said some other stuff in English and the guide turned and asked "Wow, you both English-speakers?". I thought he looked extremely happy. Must be very English-deprived.
We reached an office and he explained that this is where those who failed their tests had to go to apply to resit. One of the girls giggled and said loudly "OoooOOoh! Like bilik disiplin lorrrrrr!!!!! *giggle giggle giggle giggle*". Meanwhile, Pui Yee settle for eye-rolling and teeth-grating. The group don't even pay attention to the guide AT ALL. By the time we reach the clubhouse (with a pool, squash courts and cafe) I was kind of tired of the group and went with mom to peek into the cafe. The ambience is cool and kinda chic. I commented that the food there would be more expensive than the cafes. Shockingly, the guide heard. No moment of privacy.
And then one of those girls (bimbo hereafter) giggled and exclaimed "Has anyone died in the pool???"
After visiting the hostels, the guide cheekily asked "Anyone hungry?" The bimbos went high-pitched and giggle giggle giggle "OHHHHH you ASKED! Must buy is lunch! BUY us LUNCH! *giggle giggle giggle*"
We went to the admin building, which is attached to pre-u building and houses the computer labs. Me and mom lagged behind and stood outside and while mom was admiring the old trees and shady pathways I was necking and wondering if I'll see anyone I know. A lot of folks from my school go to TarC. We weren't there long. The guide came out and cajoled us inside. And then I discover that college actually have Wi Fi around the computer labs. Totally radical! Hey, hmm. Should I get a laptop, eh?
Of course, the bimbos have to ask "What's wireless?"
And when we exited admin building I turned back and mon dieu, saw the group of bimbos surround the hapless guide asking him questions in loud, crude Mandarin and giggle giggle giggle.
Our last stop was the library, it's 6 floors worth of information and boosts a number of what else, books. The guide made another joke, saying those with dyed hair can't enter library. The gullible dolts believed him and answered snobbishly "Nevermind. I don't need to go to library. I never enter library in school at all! No need la. *giggle giggle giggle*"
I was glad to distant myself from that bunch of scary people. REALLY jakunic scary girls in Mashi Maro and giggle like school girls.
As we walk out of library, I was saying something and finished my sentence with an exclaimation of "Shit!" The guide was in front of me, he turned and smile. I'm pretty weirded out at this point. Will remember and avoid him in campus.
I feel so mature that I don't find bad jokes funny and exam-resitting is worth giggling over.
I don't get it. When my mom is okay with it, my grandma pushes it.
Why do she always insist I take medicine or law? I don't want to hurt an old lady's feelings, but she just don't understand that I am NOT interested in science. In fact, she snapped that when I earn the big bucks, I won't care whether I'll be interested in Med but that I'll be thanking God.
And I don't care about big money.
When I change tactics and said Med is just too difficult for people like me, she HAS to go on and on about my results and that I'm always capable just lazy. What faith, ha ha ha.
To do science and suffer 5 years down the road...it's an awful, unbearable thought. I was sad to leave the chemistry lab and experiments behind, but I was glad to say bye to complicated formulae and equations.
I wish I can just be so so so rude and retort that I'm not a man, sorry, woman of law and med and the world is not made of people of these 2 very, I'm sure, noble professions. There's so many other in between, from the HR manager in the corporate ladder to the home-based catering housewife. I love being in my grandparents' house...there's always uncles and aunties around but lately I've been set up on the dinner table so often, I felt like the chopped up chicken about to be dipped and chowed.
Here's another cookie for thought:
A visitor made this comment,
Your cookie for thought was intriguing. I can relate...in a sarcastic sense. Nope, I'm not born with a silver spoon my my mouth and yep, I'm from a 'low income family'. And it doesn't take a financially-challenged teen to tell you that life's all about sacrifices. Generally, most of my peers are undertaking those 'exclusive' (ie. exorbitantly priced courses that're so expensive that they positively smell like freshly minted money, if it is possible for courses to smell) courses in, yeah, 'elite' colleges. Don't get me wrong; I think that it's awesome to be able to pursue your dreams. In fact, if given the chance, I'd opt to pursue my studies abroad. But I guess life has a way of tangling the web, huh? Simply put, I'm ranting not because my parents can't afford to give me a chance to enter a college-I'm ranting because I DON'T have the chance of having a chance. Confused? Well, I initially planned to apply for the JPA scholarship. Heck, everything was going along fine and dandy, until the red-tape factor showed up. I shan't elaborate further, but suffice to say, my application was screwed up by ignorance (on my father's part), inconsideration (my principal), and..well, partly my fault too, for waiting till the eleventh hour before I could get my act together.
Now about the cookie part, namely the 'forcing poor parents to cough up dough when there's none' bit. Personally, I feel impelled to 'force my poor folks to cough up dough'. After all, if they can't provide me with the opportunity to apply for a scholarship, they're indirectly responsible for my 'loss', right? But after a couple of days, I digressed. There'll be no colleges for me. No studying overseas...at least for now. Instead, I'm 'deflected' towards the direction of Form 6. No use whining to be put into some expensive course just for the heck of it. Or flaunting a new car, for that matter. Who knows? I might get another chance...post STPM. Gah!
I almost became the person who forces his/her parents to come up with money. Luckily, I didn't.
Pui Yee made this comment,
this would be the first time i msg my own blog - but i hope whoever u are, calcifersgrl, u'd be reading this sometime...yeah life's full of tough decisions no? there are some nights i lay awake wondering...what if, what if, what if. i'm lucky. my folks can afford me 3 options- i. form 6 then local uni, ii. tarC then Utar, iii. expensive elite, but only up to diploma. i was so selfish, i wanted expensive college, overseas AND my folks to cough up the dough. but i just can't do it. i have my bro to consider, and my folks' old age. they didn't work half their life to pay for just my and mine alone's education. life's just so much what ifs.
A visitor made this comment,
And boy, am I really glad that I have kissed all those lab reports good-bye.
I'm sure TARC would be alright. TARC seems to be stigmatized by many. Nonetheless, I'm sure there can't be sooooo many mashimarowearing-mandarinspeaking-giggly-bimbotic Ah Lians.
Anyways tell me more about college life once you actually start. All the best PY...
Yoke Yan made this comment,
Hey Pui Yee!! I'v changed my blog add. The new one's :- http://nuttage.blogdrive.com/
Visit me @ http://nuttage.blogdrive.com/
A visitor made this comment,
Wireless? You know, wireless bra? Not as much support? :/
Somehow I have a feeling you will have much fun conversing in English as I have, in Informatics KL.
Albert Ng [email@example.com]
A visitor made this comment,
Yep, I read your reply. Well, have an awesome college life. Ciao!